The break up kit. in A new beginnging.

Well, it’s official. After 5 years of living together, my brother and I are going our separate ways. Yes, I did write previously that Mark and I had made the decision to move in together. The next day I talked to my brother about it.
Since then Mark decided that he really wanted to buy a house- and due the the market being INSANE we decided to hold off a couple months before looking again since everything we liked was gone an hour later for WAY over asking price.
My brother and Caitlyn are very serious and are moving in together also, however he isn’t able to live with her until November. So after talking with him and letting him know I would be staying at the house for a while longer, I didn’t think anything of it.
But last week we nonchalantly says, “So I am putting the house on the market in 3 weeks”
Yeah. I had a melt down. I mean it is a tough time of year anyways and this news just caught me completely off guard. It threw a wrench in the house hunting plans and put a lot of things in motion MUCH faster then I was prepared for.
But after Mark calming me down and talking though the options, I am moving into his apartment. We want to move into a bigger place, live there for a year and then start the house hunt again.
This is besides the point.
When I moved back from st. cloud, my brother like saved me by getting a 2bdr and me moving in. It turned out to be such a great living situation- hence the 5 year roommate status. We have gone through a lot over these years- bad dates, breakups, fun dinners, stoned nights where we laugh at the pets and just whatever.
He became my best friend and filled a bit of the missing father gap.
But now there is just tension. He knows I’m upset about the lack of notice- he knows he’s in the wrong but we are both so similar that we just kind of hunker down and keep to ourselves when things are wrong.
I don’t even know what else is worth saying about it other than after my mom and tom left the mothers day dinner, Mark and I left to go back to his place and I just felt really sad.
What will happen to us when the house officially sells and we both are doing our own thing?
I know this is a part of life- but it’s different. It is different when you walk down the hallway of the hospital with your brother to say goodbye to your dad. Something changes from just being annoying siblings to something that I can’t even put into words.
I just don’t want to fall apart. My sister already lives in Michigan now, mom is retiring next year and going to be traveling, I am going to live with Mark and Mitch will be living with Caitlyn. It’s a lot of change in our once tight knot family.

But to end this on a positive note- I am really excited for this next chapter with Mark.
I was reading through VEEERY old entries from OD and it is just funny. Who would have thought the guy I met randomly senior year and always regretted not dating would end up being the guy I am moving in with and starting to build a life with.

Hey, everything happens for reason, right? Fuck I hate when people say that. :]