what if I had lived in poetry

scarier than this being the bad timeline
that one where everything went wrong is
the idea of this actual being the
least-bad one where things went
the least wrong
that this here is it
this is the best there can ever have been
that all the progress we almost got
is ending here
it was all for naught
this is as close as we were ever gonna get
as the posters of “hope”
fade to posters of “grope”
as the sell-offs begin
as the tanks roll in

science fictionally?
it means that we’ve got nowhere to turn
no other world to send for help from
no other time where they actually learned
no cavalry to save us
no reinforcements
nothing to sustain
the old hopes with endorsement
that there were other places
where we all took less and
we learned to give
somewhen else we could’ve lived

more historically?
if this was the best
that women and men of good will could muster
only to die up on that hill
like less-shitty Custers
all the hope and work
all the lives that they gave
and all we can do is look to the shoreline
watch the slow rolling back
of a would-have-been-wonderful wave
what do you
do then?

scarier than this being the bad timeline
is the idea that this is actually
the by-default best
look to the west for the setting sun
is that the flare of our star
is it the blast of a gun?
or I am just projecting my life
on America’s jib
what if I had been a little more fearless
what if I had lived?