I'm Running Out of Survey-Themed Titles in Things That I'm Grateful For
- Feb. 25, 2017, 8 p.m.
- |
- Public
I feel like doing one of these will either clear my sinuses or my head… either way I’ll get to empty out a bunch of nonsense that’s just clutter.
Be honest; name of the last person to text you?
It was Richard.
This time last year what was your relationship status?
On life support.
What is the 15th text message in your inbox? “Be there soon.”
How many radio stations do you listen to?
I listen only to Capitol Public Radio where they play nothing but classical during the day and jazz at night.
When was the last time you were in a car with someone besides family?
My friend Juli drove me home on Monday.
What’s your favorite show or shows?
Queer As Folk, The Golden Girls, Daria, Absolutely Fabulous, the many iterations of Star Trek, Roseanne, Murder, She Wrote.
Have you told anybody you loved them today?
Just Richard, and my little brothers.
What are your plans for the weekend?
Just this survey.
What do you currently hear right now?
My stepfather blow drying his hair.
What were you doing Friday night?
I stayed in and watched Beavis & Butt-head.
What would your name be with the first three letters?
Jus.
Do you want to see somebody right now?
I want to see a lot of people right now. Richard, all of my friends from Los Angeles, Jon Kortajarena on my bed.
Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them?
Yes.
Do you know anyone that smokes pot?
Yes, although they respect me enough not to do it in my presence… except my little brothers.
Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your bed?
That was on Heather’s couch cuddled up with Eric.
Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
My aunt.
What’s the last compliment you received?
My Lyft driver exclaimed, “Holy FUCK, you’re HOT!” When I climbed in.
Your best friend needs you at 3 am, do you go help them?
Well, considering all of my best friends are hundreds of miles away, I’d do my best but it doesn’t seem too realistic.
Have you ever slept in the same bed as your friends?
Sure.
Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months?
Yes, when I’m in a relationship, it tends to last for quite a while.
Are you on a desktop or laptop?
I’m writing this on my iPad actually.
Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
I actually think he might be.
Who was the last female you talked to?
My mother, what a strange question.
Is the last person of the opposite sex you texted single?
Heather is single, yes, but Omar is hoping to change that some day.
What does your last text message say? “So you’re saying I have a chance?” - Richard
Is there someone who has made a difference in your life?
Many many people have made a difference in my life and it would be too tedious to list them, but I’m grateful for each and every one of them.
Does the last person who texted you ever make you smile?
Richard is the only person to do that with consistency for over 10 years now.
Where do you want to live when you are older?
I’d lie to be on Orcas Island off the coast of Washington/Victoria. My grandfather’s sister lived there her whole life and we used to visit and I absolutely fell in love with the quiet stillness of it. It’s absolutely beautiful.
Where is the shirt you’re wearing from?
I can’t remember where I bought it from because I have too many denim shirts.
Would you rather tell somebody straight up, or wait?
It depends on the subject.
Is your hair long enough to put in a ponytail?
Haha yes.
Would you eat a cockroach for your last ex if they asked you?
Damita Jo.... what is the point of this question?
Are there any stressful situations in your life?
Everything is stressful but I strive to remain still in spite of it all.
When’s the last time you fell asleep watching a movie?
I can’t fall asleep with the television on.
How many cell phones have you had in your life?
More than ten.
Last night, did you go to sleep smiling?
Who does this? Creepy mannequin people? <---- Agreed.
Have you had sex today?
No. Thanks for bringing that up.
What should you be doing right now?
Cooking dinner.
What day of the week Is it?
Saturday.
What does that mean you have to do?
I have no obligations today.
What are your plans for tomorrow?
I have a casual date with someone for lunch and then I have nothing to do. I think I might go to church.
Where do you work?
I’m not telling you that.
What was the last book you read?
I finished the new Adrien English novella a few days ago, So This is Christmas, right after finishing Interview with the Vampire and dove right into The Vampire Lestat.
Are you pro-choice?
Of course.
Are you a vegetarian?
I’m supposed to be but I’m not.
What is your favorite kind of salad dressing?
I’ve always been partial to 1000 Island since I was a child.
How old were you in 2013?
I turned 30 that year.
When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be a televangelist.
Have you ever been in someone’s wedding?
Yes.
Would you rather visit the Taj Mahal or the Eiffel Tower?
Taj Mahal, as much as I love Paris, I never visited the Eiffel Tower because those kinds of monuments bore me.
Do you live in Florida, Nebraska, or Virginia?
No, do I win something?
Have you ever been to South America?
No, but my little brother lived there when he was just 16.
Did your last kiss mean anything to you?
I can’t remember the last kiss I had. It was probably Richard, so yes.
If your house was on fire, what 3 things would you try and save?
I’d save my computer because it has all my pictures on it and then what few pictures I have physically printed and then I’d take my comforter.
What does your status say right now?
WTF is a status?
Have you ever ridden on a subway?
I MISS SUBWAYS!!!!
Are your toenails painted at the moment?
Yes, they are a shimmery teal color.
Open the nearest book, turn to page 8 and type the first sentence:
Everything else was silence.
Have you showered yet today?
Yessir.
What were you doing at 11 AM this morning?
Watching Cameron prepare his diet meal for the day.
What do you plan to be doing in 2 hours?
Eating dinner.
What is your middle name?
Daniel.
Do you prefer to write in pen or pencil?
Pencil.
Do you keep a journal?
Never heard of it.
Are you still friends with your best friend from kindergarten?
Ha best friend from kindergarten?
What did you do on your last birthday?
I was wasted with my friends at the local bar.
What brand is the deodorant you use?
Dove.
What was the last movie you watched?
Juste une question d’amour
Are you ticklish?
Yes, and intolerant of people who tickle me. I’ve ended friendships because they won’t respect that boundary.
Are you shy?
Yes, but I avoid showing it with meaningless conversation.
Are you hot-tempered?
No, but I’m easily annoyed, I just might not express it.
Was your mom over 30 when she had you?
HA! She wasn’t even 20.
Have you ever won more than $100 dollars playing the lottery?
The lottery is a tax for people who can’t calculate odds.
Have you ever played strip poker?
Yes. I won which really means I lost.
What is your most memorable Halloween costume?
My birthday is Halloween so I don’t have memorable costumes because I stopped dressing up for the most part when I was 16… although, I did enjoy the flying monkey outfit I had when I turned 24.
When was the last time you ate popcorn?
Earlier this week when I saw 50 Shades Darker.
What color is the floor of the room you are in?
Crappy linoleum color.
Who is your 4th phone contact and how do you know them?
Aliesha was my co-worker.
Have you ever lived in a dorm?
No, and I’ll always regret it.
Do you live in an apartment?
Nope.
Are any of your friends pregnant?
Oh God, don’t get me started.
Do you have any nieces or nephews?
I have one niece.
Who do you trust with your secrets?
You guys, I suppose. <------ again good answer
How short would you be willing to cut your hair?
I’ve shaved my head but I don’t care for the look
Do you wish on shooting stars?
Is that a thing?
If someone made a movie about your life, who would star as you?
I’d like to think Meg Ryan would accept the role as a stretch of her range. But not THAT much of a stretch, just the gender difference.
Is your birthday in winter?
Autumn.
What’s the story behind your most noticeable scar?
I answered this on the last survey.
Is your car newer than a 2010?
No.
Did you graduate high school within the last 2 years?
Ugh.
Is there anything buried in your closet you wouldn’t want anyone to find?
I don’t have a closet.
What was the last song you listened to?
Noir éden by Peter Peter
Where do you see yourself in the next 3 years?
I can’t see six months ahead so next question....
What kind of computer do you have?
MacBook Pro.
Do you like sushi?
I love it… I just hate that I can’t eat it any longer.
Name the last thing you ate.
Jambalaya.
When is the last time you went out to eat?
Just yesterday when I went to this Southern restaurant and had fried chicken.
Where did you go?
Lucille’s is the name.
Do you like mushrooms on your pizza?
I don’t like pizza but I like mushrooms sautéed with garlic butter.
How many pairs of flip-flops do you own?
One.
Have you ever walked on the beach at night?
Yes.
What is one thing you really want right now?
To be elsewhere.
Are you 100% sure of anything right now?
I know who I want.
Do you use a bar of soap or body wash?
Bar of soap.
What’s one thing you almost always have to do before you go to bed?
Get into the bed. Duh.
Without looking can you say what color the sheets are on your bed?
Teal.
Are you dating the last person you kissed?
It’s complicated.
Do you like the way you look?
Sure.
How’s your hair right now?
Fabulous.
Last time you were outside?
When I went home to get this iPad.
Do you ever scream just to make yourself feel better?
I have a GIF answer I want to put here but it’s too complicated.
Why do you think people like you?
I don’t believe too many do.
Can you keep a secret?
Yes.
Have you ever lied to a friend?
Yes.
What would you do if you got pregnant right now?
I’d probably call a scientific journal to have my story published since I don’t have a uterus.
Have you dated more than 6 people?
Nope.
Did things end badly with your last ex?
I didn’t think so but apparently he wants nothing to do with me… whatever.
Do you know how to play Gin?
I know how to drink it. <------ again
What is your favorite board game of all time?
Ummm I don’t really like board games… but I’ll play just about anything except Monopoly (I HATE that fucking game) and that Smokers of Qatar game Edgar used to always make me play in Paris.
What is one thing people do on a day to day basis that drives you nuts?
Acknowledge me
Did you enjoy kindergarten?
I had no feelings either way regarding it.
What do you need from the store?
Absinthe.
Last updated February 26, 2017
Loading comments...