"Due to a scheduling conflict, Ash Wednesday will be on a Friday this year..." in The Stuff That's Not Interesting But Is The Most Interesting Stuff I'll Write

This weekend was predictably sedate. It was a nice change of pace compared to the orgy from a week ago… Ugh, was that a mess. So now here I am sitting at home on Oscar night watching Murder, She Wrote and craving chocolate. I’ll probably pop over to my grandmother’s and grab something out of her pantry. I always buy salty stuff and never any sweets, mainly because I hardly crave them. Every so often, however, I just really want to shove something sweet down my throat.

I was going through my Instagram and I realized that nearly half of the nearly 400 people that I follow and follow me are from France. Seriously, if I ever get back there, I will have PLENTY of people to talk to. The other half, in case you are wondering, are people that I have actually met and gotten to know through my travels. Part of having traveled the country so much meant having to get used to casual acquaintances… the sad thing is, I never realized that these were “casual” acquaintances and always mistook them for close friendships.

I’m not used to being close to people I consider my friends.

I was supposed to go on a date earlier today. He didn’t show up, but part of me is thankful for that. I don’t know what I was thinking. He was this lumberjack-looking guy who works just a few shops down from me. We got to talking in the line at Starbucks and have chatted casually for a little over a month now. I found out he was 18 despite the fact that he looks like he’s 27… I don’t know what it is, but I can’t seem to relate to guys my own age. I think it’s something I might need to go to therapy about.

But he didn’t show so now I can pull myself back from that situation a bit.

Last night, I decided to go to the gay bars for karaoke because I haven’t been in so long. I’ve been singing with the same group of people off-and-on since I was 21, and they were the group that I went to the Bay Area with last July. It was wonderful except for one little thing… they were interrupting karaoke to put on a drag show for their Mardi Gras celebrations.

Look, I have a HUUUUGE problem with people who celebrate Mardi Gras any other day but Tuesday. I get it, I can’t expect EVERYONE to know French, but everybody knows “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir” so they should be able to figure out what MARDI GRAS means. Even if you don’t know what it means, you know what it means. you just haven’t connected it to the words Mardi Gras. Translated, it means “Fat Tuesday”. It is a RELIGIOUS holiday, believe it or not, that is directly connected with Easter.

I understand when certain holidays are celebrated on alternate days because of one reason or another, but most of those holidays aren’t “day specific”. Like President’s Day or Veteran’s Day… or fucking Arbor Day! Even Christmas, it doesn’t matter what day of the week Christmas lands on, sometimes you celebrate ON Christmas, sometimes you celebrate BEFORE Christmas, and sometimes you celebrate AFTER Christmas.

But those holidays aren’t named for a SPECIFIC day of the week.

I know, I’m going off on a tangent here, I just get really pissed off by America sometimes.

Anyways, so I know that there were plenty of people who were thrilled to see a drag show for NOT Mardi Gras, filled with no-less than three of those RuPaul Drag Race people, but I was not among them. In fact, once the show had reached the two-and-a-half hour mark, I left. I’d had far too much lip-synching and jokes about make-up to possibly turn my evening around. So I went home.

The sad thing is, I was actually having a good time and not feeling any of my social anxiety… until those screaming drag fans came into the room. I don’t mean to be “one of those gays”, but I’ve never understood the appeal of drag. Richard loves drag. He even performed drag for years in San Francisco, to the point where some people don’t know his name is Richard.

I wrote a whole paragraph elaborating why I don’t care for them, but I deleted it because I just know someone’s going to get their feathers ruffled and I don’t want to have the “drag” argument. Especially not when I need to go feed my chocolate craving.

Excuse me.