Oh lawd. in Thoughts.

I kinda got drunk a few weeks ago and hooked up with this younger, ridiculously sexy man from Iraq last weekend. I met him through my friend. We went out a few times, but then stopped talking… until we ran into each other at the bar…

And I feel really stupid for admitting this… but I have a huuuge crush on him lol.

I feel young about it.

And I also realize that I am terrified of love. But also working on opening my heart up again.

I am afraid to love anyone again. So I put walls up. I like from a distance. And every time my liking someone from a distance turns into nothing… I’m disappointed and build another wall....

I realized this. And I’m starting to pull down these walls a little bit.... I’ve even flirted a little bit lol.

So of course, I’m terrified. Haha

Feel free to ignore my ramble 😝

-becca