181 P.M. in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

The rest of the morning went rather well. Tackled the morning work with my usual apathetic “do your duty” work feel that gets me through the day around here. Even got several cases finished! Then our computers went down.... for longer than expected. When they first went down, I went home for lunch and read a few more PB entries. Then I came back and… computers were still down. And Ran isn’t coming in to the office today. So… I’m starting to think, even though I was very productive this morning… I likely was not as productive as planned during the afternoon. More PB Reading, then. But on my phone. So… I think I have 4 pages left of bookmarks to catch up on. And I wish I were noting more. But really, I’m trying to read for information. Are my friends alive? Are they happy? How has 2017 been going? Any major issues? I’m sure I’ll be a noting fiend again when I get all caught up but until then… consider me the quiet, creepy guy lurking on your Prosebox.

I will say that it is a bit funny. You can tell how many PB people I read are from outside of the United States (or have decent jobs) by how many people are discussing vacations and travel. I suppose the lack of vacation and travel in my life is entirely on my shoulders. Wife receives vacation time (not much but some) but… In law school, when I wasn’t in school and studying, I was in Internships and trying to get jobs. Now that I have a job, there isn’t much opportunity or availability for any vacation. And since we’re looking to move on soon anyway, we just keep putting pauses and delays into “vacation” and “travel.”

(Switching Gears) There are two thoughts that have been running through my head a lot this weekend (and as I read PB). I’m note sure whether I should share them. I mean, I want to. I like discussing my thoughts and emotions because there are certainly a lot of things about myself and the world that I don’t understand. But… I know if I share these thoughts some people will think less of me or get angry or start labeling me and… I’m not sure I want to open myself to that. We’ll see how I feel by the end of this. If I want to put myself out there like that.

Damnable phone. Someone went to Boss’ office and asked about a Criminal Matter. Boss, being retired (so why is she in her office?) called me and handed this mystery person the phone. I am instantly greeted with wracked sobbing. Full “the world is ending” crying. I get to hear about this woman’s husband being arrested last night for DV but he isn’t violent, he just has a medical condition so we need to drop the charges but the officers said that they were Committing him and sending CPS over but they never came (and on and on, this story coming out slowly over 20 minutes of sobbing). I’m not a cold or heartless person, but I am a man that can only do what I can do. I attempt to let her know several times that I have no paperwork on this. There have been no Criminal Complaints filed. There have been no Civil Commitment Papers signed. (I didn’t put it this way but) as far as my office is concerned, this entire event has never taken place. Of course.. all of this is very frustrating. Because… we have Cowboy Cops who do things their way and then… well… maybe something gets filed? Eventually? And I lack the power to do anything about that. So… hopefully, Ran will have some idea and we can discuss all of this? Fingers crossed.

(Shudder) There are 11 days until Donald Trump is President of the United States. It causes me headaches and extreme queasiness. His supporters around here keep thinking I’m “the big city attorney just bitching that Hillary Clinton lost” and I should “get over it, lib-tard!” Except… I’m not a liberal. In a lot of ways, in important fiscal ways, I’m conservative. But more than political parties; I’m an American, dammit. And if people can’t see how dangerously unstable, how methodically chaotic, and how certifiably textbook his Narcissistic Personality Disorder… it breaks my heart and head. This thin skinned, man-child who cares more about his own image than the very country he is about to run… I’m vacillating between rage and despair as my community continues to discuss The Great Things To Come. Fucking. Morons.

(Random Point) I suppose Apathy can serve me acceptably. I have three Mental Health Patients. Not uncommon. 1 was arrested for assault and resisting arrest. Her family (the victims) refute those charges, claiming she was not resisting arrest and she hit her sister because “the defendant has the functioning IQ of a 7 year old.” I’m dismissing this case whether the Officer objects or not. Paranoid Schizophrenic was arrested with a marijuana pipe and a broken lightbulb. The patient had not taken his required medication for a month. Officer arrested him, charged him with possession of paraphernalia. The officer would like me to NOT dismiss this case. He wants the Paranoid Schizophrenic to sit in court and listen to testimony and be found guilty. And frankly, if we had the proper resources for dealing with Mental Health Patients… maybe I’d consider it. But… here comes that apathy. I’m not going to “come hard at” a Mental Patient if they aren’t a threat to others. If this guy had drugs on him; yeah… hit him for the drugs. But “a marijuana pipe and a broken lightbulb?” Give me a fucking break.

So… between that, the County Attorney not being here and the computer crap today… yeah… I think I’m just gonna NOPE the rest of this afternoon. I’ve got an hour left. I’ll read PB… I’ll catch up on E-Mail.... that should do it.