You Should Not Tolerate in BookThree: Flight Log 2016

I think I can comfortably say I have no interest in working today. And I think about that and I come to an interesting realization. If a company is worthwhile, I’ll bust my ass for it. If my co-workers are worthwhile, I’ll bust my ass for them. If the job itself is worthwhile, I’ll bust my ass for it. But… if the company goes out of its way to harm itself… if there are no coworkers… and it certainly doesn’t matter (functionally) if I were in the office or not… the very idea of doing any work is somehow Herculean. I sit here, now the only person in this entire office, and acknowledge aloud what I could do. (1) I could contact police… because they still won’t quickly and efficiently turn over Discovery. This is something that Ran wants to fix when he takes office. I will say, if he does NOT fix it after taking office, considering it was a big deal for him… that will be all the answer I need on whether I should support him. (2) My desk is once again a mess. While I have a solid grip on my Indictable Cases and Juvenile Cases… my Magistrate Cases and Mental Health Cases have exploded onto my desk. It won’t even be hard to take care of… I just… have this emotional feeling of “Does it matter? Does it really matter? Upcoming Magistrate Domestic Abuse Assault… the officer is already saying I can plead down the Domestic Abuse and make the guy plead to Interference with an Officer. And the Magistrate has now (basically) announced that there is an Officer out of La-La Land that she just presumptively assumes the arrest was invalid because this guy has been going… a bit off… filing a charge of Domestic Violence but not turning in a report.

It is one of those things, y’know? When Ran starts working around here, maybe things will improve. Maybe having someone else in this office that knows something about the law will inspire me to give a rat’s ass. But as for now? I’m just going to continue to finish up entries that have been in the “DRAFT” folder. After all, the year ends on Saturday… might as well finish up entries that I started for a book that won’t be added to in a few days.
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It is understandable for people who read my entries to think that I exaggerate, inflate, or conflate things for a more interesting narrative. I will confess that not 100% of what you read is 100% true. Everything in here is always at least 93% true unless otherwise stated. I believe suggesting a 7% window is appropriate as memory and emotion are forced to be communicated from the perspective of “I” which is a biased opinion.

That being said, it is true that I have not had many good relationships. T2 almost ways, maybe could have been, but it ended poorly. Buffy was something that was necessary for me to go through to realize… if I view the woman with TOO much respect and awe… she won’t like it much! Aku was a nightmare from hell. Thompson was never healthy and never a great relationship. And Wife, well… the struggles there are very real and very serious. So when this article about Vital Things You Should Not Tolerate In a Relationship popped up… I figured I’d post it and maybe talk about it. When reviewing this list… it made me angry for how much of this (in some form or another) I put up with… and it made me worried for if (in some form or another) I do this as well.

Abusive behavior

Whether it’s emotional, verbal, or physical abuse, you should not accept this type of behavior from the person who is supposed to love and cherish you. If he or she constantly berates you, tears you down, or hits you, move on. Quickly.

Threats

If your significant other threatens to leave you unless you behave a certain way or threatens to withhold money or other things, you may want to reevaluate your relationship.

Body shaming

It’s one thing to encourage your partner to lose weight for health reasons, it’s another thing entirely to criticize them or shame them for their appearance.

Laziness in bed

Sex should be fifty-fifty with both partners aiming to please the other. If your significant other has no interest or willingness to reciprocate between the sheets, then it’s up to you to decide whether you can live with an unfulfilling sex life.

Lying

A tiny white lie about how he feels about your mother’s cooking is one thing. Lying about his whereabouts, his financial situation, or why he’s frequently home late from work is unacceptable. If your partner breaks your trust too many times it will be hard to distinguish lies from the truth.

Controlling behavior
Beware if you’re with a person who tries to monitor your activities or finances or even tries to decide what you wear every day. It’s not normal for someone to control your life. Don’t let them.

Not publicly acknowledging your relationship

It’s a red flag if the person you’re dating doesn’t want anyone to know you’re dating. What is he trying to hide? Is he embarrassed? Is he just using you for sex? It’s likely he or she isn’t interested in a serious relationship.

Breaking promises

Sometimes people let you down, including your husband, wife, or partner. But if you’re significant other is routinely making promises that he or she doesn’t keep, than it may be time to let go. You need someone in your life who you can depend on in good times and bad. If he or she isn’t there for you when you need them most, than what’s the point?

Putting you last

There’s a reason that relationships are often referred to as partnerships. You rely on one another, help each other, and work together. But if your “partner” regularly puts his or her needs above yours, than they may be more focused on their own happiness instead of yours.

Extreme jealousy

It’s cute if your boyfriend or girlfriend pouts when they hear about an ex. It’s over the top if he or she accuses you of cheating because you friended an elementary school crush on Facebook. If your significant other exhibits signs of excessive jealously, it’s likely they have some issues they need to work through.

Ignoring your dreams or career ambitions

Spouses and partners should build their partners up, not tear them down. Your dreams and goals are important and should be treated with respect. If your significant other is bent on making you feel bad about your life decisions, it may be time to find someone else.

Keeping you away from your friends

While your partner may be your BFF, it’s also important to maintain contact with the friends you had before you started the relationship. It’s important to be surrounded by supportive friends and family. If your significant other tries to cut these ties, he or she is either trying to control you, is jealous, or doesn’t understand the significance of these friendships.

Frequent arguments

Everyone fights. But if you and your partner constantly argue, than something’s not right. The occasional fight may clear the air, but if you’re regularly bickering over simple things or big issues, than you just may not be compatible.

Sadly… I think my marriage fits 8 of those 13 :(