Home in Since OD is shutting down....

I worked 4:30 to 8:30 tonight. I had a pretty decent time and then I went over to my friends house. I just can’t believe how awesome I feel. My appetite has calmed down ALOT, my hips aren’t killing me, I’m not super tired, and I just feel…happy!! It’s nice to not feel completely exhausted and actually have energy to hang out with my friend when I get off. I hope that this continues because if it does, than I’ll be able to say I enjoyed being pregnant.

Before work I was trying to run errands but was getting pissed because everyone here drives like morons. It took me over an hour to make 3 stops. I was going to freak out if I would have been late for work. I know I wouldn’t have gotten in trouble but I can’t fucking stand being late. I was just so happy by the time I got there because everything else was annoying and taking forever!!

I went to Walmart to look at baby stuff and managed to run into some girl I used to work with so I didn’t get to do as much shopping as I wanted to but she just had a baby and said she’s got plenty of stuff to give me. I’ve actually had plenty of people say that to me and I really hope they do because then it’s less stuff I’ll have to buy and there’s no point in buying everything brand new because babies grow out of stuff really quick.

Someone is supposed to come get my extra bed tomorrow and I really hope they do and if not, I’m going to find a place to donate it that will come pick it up. I also work for a little bit tomorrow night. Super glad I was able to pick up a shift because that means I’ll get enough hours for the week. I’m really sick of not being scheduled enough and having to ask people to give up their hours so I can make a decent paycheck. Seriously this can’t continue or I’m going to have to consider moving on. It makes me happy to know that I’ll get a 2 month break when I take my maternity leave and I may not even return. I might just find something else and not go back. There’s just so much bullshit there and sometimes I get so fed up. I know there’s bullshit no matter where you work but I wouldn’t mind at least trying something else for awhile.

From what I’ve gathered, it can be difficult finding daycare for infants and you gotta sign up for a spot so I’m keeping my eyes open so I can snag a spot when one becomes available. I know that no one takes them until they are 6 weeks and that works for me because I don’t plan to go back to work until 8 weeks but I really don’t want to be out of work any longer than that. I’m really hoping I’ll find a daycare or Eric’s family will help me out so I can get back to work.

It’s a concern for me to be out of work for too long for 2 reasons. The first one is because I’m afraid I won’t be able to go back to my job super easily if they decide to ‘replace’ me and because of my anxiety, I’ve had serious issues keeping jobs until I found this one. I know that when you don’t have a job for awhile, it can be really fucking hard to get back into it so I just feel that it’s super important for me to get back to work as soon as I possibly can. I love having a job and I will be the one providing for my child so it’s a really big deal for me to be working. I refuse to end up a fucking welfare Mom. I have too many friends that live like that and it’s not okay because that’s not setting a good example for your kids. My kid isn’t gonna grow up watching me sit on the couch like my brothers and I witness my Dad do.

So I’ve been without cable for 2 months now and I’ve watched so many different shows/movies a million times that I’m going crazy. I really didn’t think I watched cable that much and didn’t think I’d really miss it but now, I know that I need it. It’s going to get hooked back up next Friday and I’m super thrilled!!! I have to pay $50 for installation but I’ll get DVR free for 6 months so I want to make some extra cash so I can pay that right away so my bill won’t make me want to shit myself. I was really looking forward to saving that $50 a month but my sanity is more important.

My rent has gone down and I’m happy about that. I plan to keep saving money and doing everything I can to get my credit card paid off before I have my kid. I plan to consider going back to school as well. I have to start thinking about the future and even if I don’t go back to college, I need to get a better paying job so I’m able to buy a house and have more room for my pets and my kid.

Anyways, I’m going to lay down now.