Wednesday Morning in New Diary

Chocolatechip went to Healthways and saw the doctor. He did not put her back on Abilify. He said her current generic med is the same thing. I was thinking he might do that. He did not change my meds when I saw him. He is known for not changing meds. Anyway we was talking about the situation and I said I think the best we can do is watch our thinking. When we start thinking bad thoughts like that divert them. Chocolatechip keep pretty busy throughout the day. I said she ought to do things that will take her mind off of her thoughts.

Anyways she was disappointed in what the doctor told her. She said it was a wasted trip But she was doing better today. I said that and she said I have to do better. I agree with that We both have to do better

I can’t let myself go down the tubes. There are things I can do to help myself. It wouldn’t hurt me to sit outside. I know staying in my apartment all the time is not helping my mental health. I can sit outside walk around the parking lot I can do a lot of things that would require more activity. Sitting all damned day reading books and playing computer games is not good.

I woke up; at 7 today. I am feeling a lot better I am not depressed. I have a whole new attitude about my neighbors and people in the building. Hell with them. They are not paying my rent or cable bill. They are not buying food for me. They are not paying for my meds. I do not have to worry about what they think of me. As long as I keep myself clean, pay my rent, keep my apartment clean I am home free. I think I need to focus on this instead of worrying all the time

Always remember to count your blessings 1 I have a roof over my head. 2 I have insurance that pays for most of the cost of my meds. 3 I have clothes to wear. 4 I have food to eat. 5 I have a wonderful fiancé in Chocolatechip. 6 I am in fairly good physical health. 7 I am not hooked on alcohol or drugs. 8 I have phone, internet and cable tv. 9 I have plenty of books to read. 10 I have worker that comes in every day and cooks and cleans. 11 I am debt free 12 I have an SSI and social security check. 1`3 I have a wonderful support system in Healthways.

Life is pretty good There is no reason to get depressed or worry