Just Another Court Day in BookThree: Flight Log 2016

(1) It is funny. If I encourage myself to keep writing, writing makes me happy. But writing about my present life certainly isn’t doing anyone any good. But a creative writing or even editorial writing is a struggle.

(2) I got an e-mail today claiming to be from my law school. It was soliciting information and I typically don’t respond to those e-mails anyway. But I am wondering very carefully if it was a scam. If it was… poor taste. If not… the school needs to understand that a lot of people may see the “From” line and immediately chalk it up to a scam. I looked into it and it is the name of the current President of the school. Building up to the reveal here. This Jesuit Catholic School in the heart of Downtown Omaha is presided over by a man named Richard P. Virgin. Dick Virgin. That seems… unfortunate.

(3) Last night, I surrounded myself with music and it was good. Music has always been a big part of my life and I have to admit… I am damn lucky to live in the internet age. If I had to rely on local radio, I’d get Country Music and a static-y Christian station. Having access to Pandora, YouTube, and iTunes makes a big difference. Because… parody music, British Punk, Chinese Traditional, KPop, Japanese Music of all kinds, Symphonies, Quartets, Genre Mash Ups… I have an eclectic and deep appreciation of music… and “just country” would drive me starkers!

(4) All day, I’ve been thinking a lot about one of my early High School roles. The senior students wrote a series of One Act Plays investigating humanity and the nature of life (broad, I know) and the One Act I was cast in was about (loosely) spirituality’s influence on human interaction. I played a smooth talking, sharp dressed Demon that was strong arming an Angel to funnel me souls “on the line” or some such plot device. I’ve been thinking a lot about that role lately because it was so much fun to play. Completely becoming this different entity, filling the character with life, sharing him on the stage, then putting him away afterwards. It was incredibly fun and I miss it terribly.

(5) Court Issues: Today in court I actually almost felt like an attorney for a minute. I behaved, in one case, the way I felt an appropriate attorney would. And it made me wonder if I could convince Wife to let us move back to Omaha, lol. I know she’d say no and refuse, of course. Even after this place. (Which, last night she greeted me then asked how much longer we have to stay here.) But… there was an Omaha City Attorney that was a great help to me and I would love to work in his office. Part of that is because… consider this (though it may be obvious)… Douglas County has an attorney’s office with lots of professional attorneys. They deal with county matters; including civil, crime, juvenile, sexual assault, and mental health (and yes, each of those is their own department). Omaha City has an Attorney’s Office with lots of professional attorneys. They deal with city matters. Mostly civil and criminal matters. The City attorney’s office has on staff more attorneys than operate in my present county. I’m not talking “then my office”… I mean then ALL attorneys practicing in this county. Bah… I’m just… I got to feel like an attorney today for all of ten minutes… and it reminded me why I loved working Court Rooms in Omaha… and made me sad about my current situation as even though I am an attorney… I’m not an attorney. Not even most of the time.

(6) Court Issues: Sometimes my interactions in court make me want to stand up and say, “No more government hand outs for anyone!” I mean… clearly I’m not that guy. I believe in a world where people don’t starve to death in one of the richest countries in the world. BUT there are plenty of individuals I see that make me think the system is fundamentally broken. People will always use money in the order of their priorities. If drugs are a number 1 priority; that is what they will spend their money on. If debt isn’t a priority to them; they will never spend money on it. Take Mr. “MR” today. He is constantly getting in trouble for drugs and fighting. And (welcome to the county) he gets fines only. So right now he owes us over $1,200. And the last time he paid anything was January of 2001. 2001. This guy hasn’t paid any of his criminal debt since before 9/11! So we send out demand letters and he actually shows up today. He’s saying that he doesn’t have any money, hasn’t had a job in a long time, can’t get employed, etcetera. And if he came in destitute, I’d understand and try to work something out. He didn’t. He’s in fresh clothes. He’s angry that we’re bothering him. Apparently, he spends all of his time smoking weed and reading books… and that’s all he cares about. So… money for food, clothes, your car, your lifestyle… but I tell him, “Even if it is one or two bucks a month; can deposit money; anything… if you work with us we can help.” And he says, “Put me in jail if you’re gonna.” Truly a man who knows exactly where he lives… and that this place won’t/can’t do anything about it.

(7) Court Issues: Several months ago, a trooper gave a young black girl a ticket for driving 90 mph in a 55 mph zone. QUITE the speed. When writing her the ticket, the officer also discovered that her privilege to drive had been suspended for 6 separate violations. Also… discovered she was only 17! So… 17 year old black girl driving through Podunk Iowa… podunk white trooper writing her a ticket for 90 in a 55 and Driving Under Suspension. She balls the ticket, throws it on the ground, says she “ain’t paying that ticket” and drives off. Now here we are… 3 months later. And she hasn’t appeared for any court dates, hasn’t paid any fines, and all searching turns up that this individual may exist, but nobody has seen her in a while. Everything about this case seems odd to me.

(8) Facebook Issue: One of my ultra-LBGTQ advocate friends is absolutely destroying Michelle Rodriguez today for being a “cis woman playing a trans person.” Here’s my offensive stance… I’m not going to judge my friend for demanding a Trans character be played by a Trans person. I’m not judging. I think that Asian characters should be played by Asian people. And I acknowledge that those issues are separate from White Characters should be played by White people. But we also have to agree (I think) that if someone is going to get passionately upset that a Cis is playing a Trans or a White is playing an Asian… if we give ourselves permission to get passionate about that… I think, then, that we don’t have the right to get pissed off at people who say a White Character should be played by a White performer. As I said, I acknowledge that there is historical and cultural differences present in those statements… but if we are going to get emotional about Ethnicity/Gender Identity casting… we shouldn’t judge other people who get emotional about Ethnicity/Gender Identity casting issues. Maybe you think I’m oversimplifying. But still… if you’re going to be furious about a Cisgender playing a Transgender… you don’t get to judge me for thinking an Asian Actress should be playing Major Motoko Kusanagi or thinking that casting Will Smith as Floyd Lawton wasn’t the best decision.

(9) Interesting Locals Issue: One of the locals asked me how things are going. I said mixed; and they volunteered that it is probably hard to do my job with my boss being so far removed from it all. True statement. I then said, “and it is hard for my wife going from Omaha to here.” And the local volunteered all of the reasons that was understandable… even saying “It would be an absolute pain to need to go an hour’s distance two or three times a week to do things.” Her solution? What the local has done to survive the area? Well, first of all, she likes it here anyway as she is a local so grew up here… but what she does to stave off loneliness and boredom is devour books. Just reads reads reads reads reads. Which, I suppose would be fine. But… I read a lot already. I mean… in my professional life, I’m reading a lot and in my personal life I’m reading a lot. And I’ve been trying to get my wife back into reading for a long time (buying her books she asks for) but she seems… resistant to the whole “reading for fun” thing. And even my Sister In Law (who adores reading) needs more in her life than books. This is just one of those things where it is nice (and interesting) when the locals are understanding and even volunteer their own frustrations with the area.

(10) Work Stuff: So… even though it was a court day, I really wanted to get some significant amount of work done. Because… so much of my life here is honestly wasted. Really and truly wasted. The fact is… I could probably piss away 97% of my week most weeks and be totally fine. Which, of course, is another thing that just bloody eats at my spirit. I have always worked best when I’m juggling because I am on top of it. When, like most of what I’ve got now, is… “we’ll get to it sometime in the next six months”… that… doesn’t work for me. I mean, hell. Of the 20 actual cases (indictable cases); I have vague non-committal deadlines on 3 of them. And the deadline is simply “Have something filed officially indicting the person.” The other 17 cases? Just kind of hanging out. One of the “hanging out” ones pisses me off beyond reason. I’ve sent the defense attorney a plea and I’m working on discovery. We’ve been at that point for 3 months now. I can’t get the officer to help me with discovery because he’s campaigning for sheriff and never gets my messages. And, if the defendant takes the plea deal, I won’t have needed to do discovery at all to begin with! THEN I’ve got the case of the guy who refused my plea deal and demanded to go to Jury Trial. Except… there’s been no depositions, no jury selection, no trial date. This is absolutely no way to run a Justice System. And while some of these hiccups are certainly to be expected; most of them are shocking. Because they would never fly in an area that gave a damn about procedure or law. Which again makes me nail-bitingly worried that this area may eventually cause some issue that would thus prohibit me from being a lawyer. That would be frustrating as hell. More than frustrating… it would destroy my career prospects in the state!
Anyway… I’m trying to sit myself down and force myself to get work done. Meanwhile, I’m getting phone calls about things I have no idea on… and my Boss has the same answer “I don’t know, call the Assistant.” Because she’s focusing on her retirement. So… my day is complicated by my own emotional blocks. Namely… (again, repeatedly) trying to figure shit out on my own and hoping I don’t do anything that would get me in trouble with The Bar.

And while I 100% agree that I desperately need a mentor… truly, I desperately need a mentor… the rules of Conflict prevent that possibility at present. Even the lawyers that have offered to give me advice… this County employs me and my boss. Then contracts all defense work to a grand total of 5 other law offices. And to even find a total of 5 other law offices, they had to pull from 3 separate counties. So the sheer emptiness of this area massively complicates the issue. Obviously, my fingers are crossed tightly that whoever replaces my boss will be more competent and more available… but most people are already saying that it is likely nobody will apply for the job. That is how Lawyer Poison this area is. That nobody would even apply for the job!

And as shitty as it is to say… if I felt like I had a good shot at doing this job properly… I’d be a much happier person. I know I go back and forth on Social vs. Work but… it really is true… I spend a minimum of 45 hours a week doing this job. Socially… add video games, reading, eating, sleeping, exercising, self-maintenance.... my “free time” that causes me issues is 45 hours a week. And I can fill some of those hours with driving or scheduling things with friends out of town from time to time. Work? That is… almost every day for 9 hours straight. But I’m trying to shake myself out of that thinking. I’m trying.... trying… to do my job the best I can. But… yeah. I’m extremely frustrated with how close “the best I can” is to “barely worthwhile.”

All of that, interestingly, underscored by a rise (possibly 9/11 related) of sentiment claiming “Life is short. We never know the time or place. You may have a moment or a lifetime left.” And I admit… every “If you were diagnosed with BLANK and only had BLANK months to live…” every single scenario starts with me quitting this job.

I’ll end this whole thing here as I attempt to get more work done. More stupid, futile, usually incorrect work done.

But here’s a more positive ending. I love John Cheese on Cracked.com. If I was funny or had an interesting perspective… I’d beg the man to make me his Writing Apprentice and hire me on as a Copy Boy for Cracked. http://www.cracked.com/blog/no-current-generation-isnt-too-politically-correct/