to the tune of BETTER MAN in song parodies

hipster Christmas sweaters, the trend is dead, it can’t get deader
tell him, take no more, we practice intervention
when he opens the door, eyes roll over
while he sleeps, we’ll burn that pull-over

don’t lie and say you’re in love with it, damn ugly sweater, man…
the threads are green and the threads are red, damn ugly sweater, man…
damn ugly sweater, man
damn ugly sweater, man
ohh…

talkin’ to himself, he say this is a really funny joke…
he tells himself, oh…
dog in Santa hat, its ears so long…
like the fixed-gear bike of which he’s so fond…
he thinks he’s cool, when he puts it on…

don’t lie and say you’re in love with it, damn ugly sweater, man…
the threads are green and the threads are red, damn ugly sweater, man…
don’t lie and say you’re in love with it, damn ugly sweater, man…
the threads are green and the threads are red, damn ugly sweater, man…
damn ugly sweater, man
damn ugly sweater, man
yeah…

he loves it, yeah… misunderstands irony
in twelve months, yeah… goddamned thing is back again

damn ugly sweater, man
damn ugly sweater, man
damn ugly sweater, man
damn ugly sweater… man