Day 2 Month 1 Year 2016 in BookThree: Flight Log 2016

Oh… my body is ridiculous. I only missed a few days of pills before I got my Rx filled and yet… Saturday was rough. Sore, lots of pain, sleepless, zombie-like. And… the current “sleeping arrangements” probably haven’t been helping.

Here’s… a joke. I mean, I think it is a joke. This is actually happening… but it is a joke.
An average night:
I being to make up the futon in the living room. Wife notices and protests. She wants me to sleep in the bed next to her. I tell her that she has been… rather adamant that my snoring creates a situation where she cannot get proper sleep. She encourages me to get into bed anyway. I do. She gets into bed shortly thereafter (completely dressed sweatpants/sweatshirt) and we fall asleep. Inevitably, shortly thereafter… I am awakened over and over and over again by her in the night because I’m snoring. At some point, the constantly being awakened gets to me, I grab my pillows and go out to the futon. In the morning, she has no recollection of how many times she woke me up.

That has become (pretty much) a habit.
Wife’s suggestion for a solution is… that I get more exercise. Because my snoring has gotten louder which “clearly means” I’ve gotten fatter.
Now… I’ll admit that I do want to work out more and I know I should. However: (1) when I’m trying to work around chronic pain anyway, that is a difficult proposition. (2) Trying to find time for Pretrial, Law Library, Job Hunting, Taking Care of the Apartment, etc… takes a schedule toll. Humorously, Wife says that doesn’t count because she has a full time job and works out at least once a week. To that I think (but don’t say)… 40 hours a week of a job is not the same as (essentially) Two Part Time Jobs plus Job Hunting. There is a reason a lot of people say “Looking for work is a full time job in itself.” But more importantly… once a week isn’t really going to do much. (3) I suppose the big thing? I am 5 feet 8 inches tall (or about 1.66 meters tall). I weigh 215 lbs (or around 98 kg or more than 15 stone). While that is certainly more than I wish to weigh, I personally wouldn’t consider that “terribly fat.” However… it seems that classic American Models of Fitness and my wife agree… the “Ideal Height/Weight” says… get this… normal for my height is 123 to 168 lbs. I can’t even imagine how emaciated someone would look at 5‘8 and 123 lbs!! Scratch that… I can. When I was a senior in High School (when I was in Thespians, Mimes, Competitive Swimming, Orchestra, Improv Troupe and before I started taking medication)… I was 5‘8 and 120 lbs. Wife has seen pictures and is aghast and disgusted by how skinny I was. So was my family… thus why for the next 5 years everyone was always trying to get me to “gain weight.” Well… medication plus weight gaining attempts worked. In 11 years, I gained 95 lbs. That was hard on my body (stretch marks) and hard on my mind (yeah, my already low self-esteem plummeted)… and now that my body has a new homeostasis of between 205 to 220… Wife and Family think I’m too heavy. To the point where after my last physical… my doctor did a full work up and said “I wish I had results like these when I was your age! Blood pressure, heart rate, everything here says you’re in perfect health!” I told my wife that and her first reaction was: “Did he weigh you?”

BTW: Average weight of the American Male Population in 2010? 195.8 lbs.

I suppose… yeah, I do want to lose weight. I would be THRILLED if I could get my body to a homeostasis where I’m consistently between 158 and 165 lbs. That would be ideal. But that means I need to lose about 60 lbs. I suppose that isn’t impossible… just difficult. It will take time, knowledge, discipline, concentration, sacrifice.... all things that are on short supply right now.

Looking into the first Full Week of 2016.... I have my eye appointment on Monday; it will be interesting to see how bad my eyes have gotten, how expensive new glasses will be, and if I’ll be able to afford Rx Sunglasses (if so, it’ll be the first time ever.) I have 7 hours of pretrial scheduled… 20 hours of law library (with the option for more). I have more applications to fill out. But really? I am expecting to hear from two locations this week.... if I don’t… doesn’t mean I’m not hired but… it doesn’t mean I am hired. AND with one of these places… I’m actually confident that I’ll either get the job or be in the top two for contention.

Last updated January 03, 2016