too much love in The Wonderland Years: 2015. Done.

this is from yesterday. er sat. i mean. again. copied from my fb:

‘i don’t quite know how to handle this much love. well i do but it still terrifies me. just like the phantom in the end i think. i think that’s why he turned people away. in my opinion. um no. so as i’ve said the lady had some of her family over. and when they were getting ready to leave [well more her grand daughters] [and then like after an hr. they didn’t] the lady’s husband is like ‘i love you guys. and i know you’re ladies but i still think of you as not being. and you know if you ever get in a jam you can call me’. sure my parents have offered me the same thing but i’ve never called. cause i don’t like being taken care of in that way. it’s not nice it’s annoying. [like 90% of the time when i was out i got back ok though i got a lost a lot in fl. for the longest time i would not take a cab and still avoid it]. also i don’t want to bridge that gap between my parents & i. i mean i’d call a friend if....... so i’d call someone just not my parents.’

oh out being out at karaoke. and in fl. where i went to college. i’d call a friend if they’re ok w/ that is what i meant.

‘um also.......he seems like a really caring guy. the husband. [well i would hope so i mean they’re his family too]. it’s just. wow ok being around this much love and warmth is scary and i want to run. as i do when i get uncomfortable.’