Results in Book Two: The Fifteenth Year of the Third Millennium of the Common Era

Well… it seems that there was not to be any alcohol induced sex. I’d say that I am disappointed, and in truth part of me is, but I have grown entirely too accustomed to waiting… and waiting… and waiting. Truly.

And of course my fantasies take flight. But instead of drifting to the maddening What Ifs of Aoife (as was once the usual) the mind drifts to Impossible What Ifs of Work Crush.

All of that is interesting considering today’s date. I don’t know if this is romantic, creepy, pathetic or what but… today’s date always has special significance for me. December 17, 2000 was the first time I asked someone out and they said yes. Seems a strange thing to honor this many years later but it always feels a little special.

Law Library certainly had its moments today.
During an In-Mod interview with a female her history and lifestyle became pretty clear. Obviously, it should as I am asking her questions about her past and present to assist with placing her in Treatment Programs… but still. A bright, semi-attractive young woman who is well spoken but manipulative… she lived with an attorney for a long time and had a son by him; then left when he started impeding her drug habit. She tried to get clean, “fell in love” with the man who ran the treatment facility and got married… which lasted a year because he found out she wasn’t really “getting clean” at all but using the relationship to help with the whole “See, I have his support” defense. We’ll still put her into programs, where I’m sure similar stuff will happen… but that’s why I’m glad I just collect the information … not make the decisions.

THEN.... then..... yeah.
EVERY single inmate says their attorney is shitty, sucks, doesn’t do anything, and should be fired. EVER SINGLE ONE! And I try really hard to be understanding and calm. Because most of these guys? They are upset that their attorney doesn’t update them daily. That isn’t an exaggeration… I had a guy yelling how upset he was that his attorney hadn’t called him today (and when I asked when the last communication was, he said he saw his attorney in person yesterday!) When I try to explain that their attorneys are busy working on their cases, working on other people’s cases.... they get more angry. Because… how dare anyone be of equal importance to them. (Probably how they wound up here in the first place).
So to help with some of the legal understanding of how things go (or are supposed to go); I’ve come up with the explanation the Supreme Court has given about Lawyers and Inmates and all of that. “Lawyers are masters of the strategy; Clients are masters of the case. The lawyer gets to make decisions about what motions to file and how many; while the client gets to decide on the pleas and whether to testify at trial.”

Typically, that has been in some manner acceptable to most. Then we had a guy today that continually tried to start an argument with me about it. I explained it the way I just did. “Naw, man. That’s bullshit. That violates my rights.” So I try to explain it to him as I would a child and he says, “That is not the truth. That isn’t the way it happens. She’s got to ask me before she can do anything.” So then I tried to explain it to him on a simple logistics basis… how his case would stretch out for MONTHS if every time his attorney wanted to do anything he had to be contacted. This, at least, distracted him…
because he started asking me about what he needed to do to make sure his case doesn’t get “fucked up.” We talk about his case and he tells me that his lawyer continues to say, “This is a slam dunk. You won’t get convicted. Don’t worry.” And I am a little leery… no attorney will say that unless they are (1) absolutely certain that they can win; or (2) are an absolute idiot. So, I check to see who his attorney is. It is one of the woman who I respect MOST in this state. If this woman says, “Slam dunk” then this guy is going home… absolutely. So I tell him that he just needs to relax. He has a wonderful attorney and, while it can be frustrating to not be able to do anything, she is going to do everything in her power to help. He didn’t understand… because how can a woman, especially a lawyer, know how to help him? ::SIGH:: Gosh, maybe because she’s “more than just a woman” and “successfully completed law school” and has “years and years of experience at trial.” Just a guess. THEN the “gentleman” spent the next twenty minutes explaining in graphic detail how he would rape his attorney… not because he was mad at her, but because she was (and honestly is) a very beautiful woman. Imagine my disgust and (deeply suppressed) outrage. It… it made me want to be a prosecutor SO MUCH more.

And his attitude, and the growing attitudes of the inmates, can best be examined with this quick article. For those without the time or interest; the article is for lawyers but is equally applicable to doctors. The fact that WebMD said your headache means you have cancer is NOT a sufficient medical diagnosis. The fact that your Google search said statements given without Miranda are inadmissible does NOT mean that you know more than your lawyer. Seriously. Seriously! Are other professions getting this a lot, too? Has access to information made people blind to the value of collected knowledge? Cuz… I can read a recipe on how to make a wedding cake, but I’m not going to order a cake and think I know more than the baker. I’m not going to research Video Game Development and then declare that I could code a game better than a professional. Why is it that so many people have this… frankly ridiculous notion that a Google Search is as valuable as a professional?