elementals of life in Conversation
- Nov. 30, 2015, 11:21 a.m.
- |
- Public
I just received an e mail from an old friend who went silent for awhile stating she had not only improved her life on the happiness scale but went from poly morph relationship to married. She espoused glee as I visualized and feared Hindenburg moments from its fiery crash then doom and death.
One may judge this response as sour grapes, jealousy or just a negative outlook on life. Sad to say tentacles of these traits may be coloring my response but foreboding of certain disaster is the primary.
I know there are people out there with solid, functional marriages. Does the marriage make the relationship more functional? Does it make it a better world to live within together? My experience, sadly, is no. Before marriage:
More excitement.
More travel.
More intimacy.
more frequent sex.
More um… elaborate sex.
Mare acts of impulsive loving gestures, cards, flowers, impulsive trips and adventures.
Marriage starts the process of goal setting. It’s seems to predicate on “settling down” where settling down starts feeling like settling period. Money, investments, property as examples become forefront. Although it is nice to be comfortable and not live paycheck to paycheck the “live” part becomes morphed into some mundane aberration missing the happiness quotient we began with.
Some people figure it out and truly seem very happy. I do not wish to dismiss this fact.
Life is filled with elementals. Common, easy to agree on fragments of a happy life. They should be like pieces of a puzzle. Simple to ascertain, recognize and put together.
In today’s societies we have wrongly accepted the theory that more pieces we have the better it will be. The truth is the more we have the harder the puzzle becomes.
So what do we do?
We love, we share, we trust and we simplify.
Last updated November 30, 2015
Skikkles911 ⋅ November 30, 2015
I'm only 29 and I've had way too many of my friends already go through divorces. I can't believe people are so young when married, go "nope" after a year, and are done...
I thought love was much more than that but I wouldn't know I guess.
Notdeadyet Skikkles911 ⋅ November 30, 2015
I think the error of it all is over confounding love with all the social expectations. Pressure to marry and that love must be a progression instead of letting it be what it is.
Ask yourself how many seemingly great relationships you know of quickly devolve once the "I do's" are said. It's frightening.