15-08.29.133 in Book Two: The Fifteenth Year of the Third Millennium of the Common Era

This is a rant. I know that going in. Therefore, there need not be any rationalizations or discussions stemming from certain elements of this. Obviously, I always listen to notes. I haven’t been responding to notes as I would like and (at present) I have over 1800 windows open right now trying to catch up on PB reading and such, lol.

ONCE AGAIN… sleep is my estranged and angry lover.

Couldn’t fall asleep last night. Not a wink! I saw the sunrise. I got up to start my day and cook some stuff because… why not. But… wouldn’t you know… honestly, I fell asleep. Not even kidding. Decided to get out of bed and stop wasting time since sleep was obviously not coming and BOOM. Sleep time. For most of the day. Angry making bull shit! That kind of behavior is certainly not going to help me conquer the insomnia. Blah!

But the bigger part of the rant… that I’m tempering, really, is Wife and her Career Coaching homework. Every time she’s doing a reading or a computer exercise… all I hear is bitching. Like… her reading? “Oh this will never help me. This is dumb. This doesn’t even make any sense. Blah blah meh meh meh.” Or the computer exercises. She does a survey on values. She does a survey on talents. The computer gives her a list of what jobs meet both talents and values. She has 7 options. Every option? “Oh, that sounds boring. Oh, I would never do that job. Oh, that just doesn’t appeal to me at all.” Just… constant bitching. I bite my tongue because I know that she knows what I’m going to say. But I simply tell her to “take it to the Career Coach and get out of her own way.”

But… Wife wants to work. We’ve discussed the whole “Maybe you don’t want to work… could that be it?” And she firmly says no. She wants to work, she wants to DO something and she wants to earn money. Okay, fine. We’ve discussed how maybe the occupation that is best suited for her isn’t some magical panacea that will make everything in her life awesome. She claims that she knows that. But… still. It’s like tear my hair out shit. Wife is exploring her options, having a professional and a system of computers help her figure out where she might best fit in the Job World. Meanwhile… I’m at my wits end trying to find ANY job in the legal field that will hire me. So… no, I don’t want to hear how a job that a computer says is perfect for her sounds “too boring”… because without ever having DONE that job… you don’t know! Gr. Sorry. Said it was a rant. Definitely just… I’m not in a place to deal with Wife bitching about her job and her career coaching while I’m having such a difficult time finding anything.

Last updated September 03, 2015