Corn whiskey, dirt weed in The eye of every storm

I can’t imagine having a better day.

American Landmark Club Of Hiking and Outdoor Leisure was a smashing success last night. ALCOHOL hiked through this bar, and so many people from so many different walks of life met each other, conversed, and shared many laughs and drinks and food. Next week’s “Summit” for hiking club is all set, and not by me. I want this club to maintain itself, and so far, the machine appears well oiled.

So a few people may have slept with each other that didn’t mean to. Some people pissed each other off. Whatever. 98% of the meeting was incredibly awesome. In attendance were several people from Major Airline, a federally appointed judge, several people from Enemy Airline, a Cargo supply specialist, a piano teacher, an English teacher, a yoga instructor, a fashion model, and a photographer. And most everyone hit it off immediately.

I bought every “hiker” one drink as a thank you for joining ALCOHOL. My tab, $80.00, wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Consequently, everyone ended up buying me a drink and I became a little bit schwasted. But whatever. Eight Dogs. Eight Banjos.

We slept in today and had sort-of sleeping morning sex. She, I think inadvertently, started grinding into me. Or maybe she was having one hell of a dream. Either way, my penis fell into her vagina, and that became the theme of the day. Several times. Sex is amazing you guys.

Um.

We went antiquing at this place that is a smaller, indoor version of a flea market. I acquired a portrait of my celebrity crush Audrey Hepburn, a creepy portrait of a priest before a cross looking all exorcisty, and a bust of Vincent Price. What a haul.

We then came home and had sex again. Amazing, wet, delicious, steamy, thong-pulled to the side because there is no time to take it off sex.

Then we met her grandparents for dinner. Fun, right? Are you with me so far?

Um.

I’m not a fan of chain restaurants. Living in The City for so many years now, I’ve never encountered them, and primarily subsisted on locally amazing, adequate dining institutions. We have many farm to market kind of places. Anyway. Chain Restaurant did not agree with my stomach after never eating at Chain Restaurants. Terrible choices were made.

Anyway.

Um.

I came home and played guitar and sang The Girl to sleep, primarily doing Old Crow Medicine Show and U2 covers.

I guess here’s some pictures. People like them.

The Girl with Doctor John Watson

my new Vincent Price bust. It looks sexy as hell as a mantle center-piece. The Girl does not approve, but whatever, I pay the bills around here.

My sexy Hepburn portrait. It’s lame, but my celeb crushes are Audrey and 1943 Lana Turner. Screw Emma Watson, Katy Perry....whatever. They’re nothing compared to those gals. Also there is my creepy exorcisty picture. It’s pretty exorcisty.

Last updated August 07, 2015