Movie Review: Mad Max: Fury Road. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
- June 16, 2015, 5:26 p.m.
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- Public
I was looking forward to seeing Mad Max: Fury Road. As a rule, that’s a bad thing. I wanted to like it, because it’s upsetting stupid boys.
It felt like a campy 80’s movie with three hours of Michael Bay SPLOSIONS. I can’t remember the last time I saw so many explosions. The pacing was terrible; it felt slow as HELL. The first couple hours, I was waiting for the movie to start. The tropes of Good People and Bad People are established. But other than Furiosa, I couldn’t tell you any of their names. Why was Skeletor in charge? Why was everybody painted white? I just assume Skeletor keeps a harem because he’s a Bad Man.
I wasn’t even sure WHO MAX WAS until the very end. I am VERY BAD at reading between lines, and spent most of the movie confused. I mean, what was the point? Was it aesthetic? Four hours of desert chase scenes? THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ONE LONG CHASE SCENE. Skeletor sends WAVE AFTER WAVE of his own men, but oh look, THERE’S MORE. After the hundredth guy tries to board the HeroTrain, you stop caring. Oh look, another guy died. Whoop-de-do.
Why was mister BaneFace hooked up to the front of a car, other than to make him poop his pants? Why was there a blood transfusion thing? Was he superhuman? Why did he attack the HeroTrain? Why did he then JOIN the HeroTrain? WHY WOULD THEY LET HIM ON THE HEROTRAIN? Why did White Parched Lips Guy switch sides?
If Water is at such a premium, how are Grandmas With Guns surviving?
After the thousandth Bad Guy dies to his death, I found myself laughing at the wrong moments. Like I said, 80’s camp. It’s so over the top that I eventually couldn’t take it seriously. IT’S A FIVE HOUR CHASE SCENE. I’m trying to think of something positive. A guy with a flaming guitar on top of an EvilTrain? Is that supposed to look cool? Why is everybody willing to die for Skeletor?
Wow, I almost feel bad for not liking it. I didn’t realize how much I didn’t like it. Maybe people like it for the aesthetic; I certainly like some movies for aesthetic. But after a six hour boring car chase, I just couldn’t get into it.
Oh wait, now I remember the positive thing. It makes stupid boys upset. That’s about it.
Phade ⋅ June 16, 2015
This is what I wrote briefly about Mad Max when I saw it.
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I mean, obviously, it takes all kinds and you can dislike it all you want but I feel like most of what you were looking for from the film is THAT YOU WANTED the movie EXPLAINED to you. And it wasn't just going to do that. It's VISUAL storytelling, which is SO SO RARE. You have to extrapolate what it means in a world where it's just survival. Yes, it IS essentially an entire movie of a chase scene but I disagree that you care less about the characters because even though dialogue was at a premium, people ACT to explain themselves instead of mostly telling you who they are in monologues.
But hey, now I know why someone would dislike the film.
Timmy™ Phade ⋅ June 16, 2015
Damn straight I like things explained. That's why I'm a picky reader, too. : D
I mean, obviously I "cared" about the HeroMobile, but I couldn't tell you anything about their characters. Otherwise I could have been rooting for Skeletor and the Evil White Boys.
Phade Timmy™ ⋅ June 16, 2015
SPOILERSPOILERSPOILER for anyone else.
It's a movie where humanity is stripped to its most primal edge, where the past is wiped out and the future has no direction. The film would be a much poorer one if Max and Furiosa sat around and talked about their feelings and where they came from and how they came to be who they are.
It wouldn't make any sense in-movie as they are survivors who rarely give any fucks. Max's goal: to stay alive. Furiosa goal: redemption (an implication of the horrors that she must have done and escaped from to be in a position she was in). Just the way that Max let Furiosa have a go with the sniper rifle knowing she was probably better but without any words between them. The way that Max destroyed the Bullet Farmer unseen and just came back with provisions. I find that those kinds of actions show who they are as characters.
Instead of just being helpless damsels in distress, the five wives use what they have to fight back. When Max/Furiosa/Nux where having that initial chained-fight, the wives get into it, instead of cowering. I feel like that as a group that's a reasonable peek into their character, as well as the small touches throughout the film.
You COULD be rooting for the Warboys, as they're pretty interesting. They worship car culture on an altar of V8 engine. The personalized steering wheels. The fact that Nux has a V8 engine scarred into his chest. The hand sign that they do where they cross their fingers into a V, with 8 fingers, signifying V8. The fact that their heaven 'Valhalla' begins with V with 8 letters. I'm just sayin', it's super detailed.
Timmy™ Phade ⋅ June 16, 2015
...I got absolutely none of what you described from watching it.
Not my style of movie, I guess.
Deleted user ⋅ June 17, 2015
I saw it, came out of the cinema so confused. I agree that it was just a four hour long chase in the dessert. If it weren't for the fact that I had paid $11 to see it I would have walked out early.