It wasn't me in Random Thoughts

I had some odd dreams over the weekend.

First: i can face my soul in the end.... can you?
Second: police abuse of power (i had two drinks last night, how can my blood alcohol be enough to hold me and my 6th grade students?)

I think the second one is guilt because i drove home after having 2 drinks at a belly dance benefit on Saturday night. But, i was there for 3 hours and paced myself (i think). I rarely drive after having had a drink, so i always feel guilty.

The first one was facing death after my car careens off a road inside a mountain. I just remember looking at a construction worker and he asked me about my soul. I said, “Of course i can face my soul in the end. Can you?”

Kevin said that it was prideful that i felt that way. I told him that just because he had issues, it did not mean i did. What do you think?

Also, i received a late night text from Kevin letting me know that he is moving out “probably” at the end of April. Then he came back at 1am, drunk and angry. I don’t know where the anger was focused, because he is illogical when intoxicated. He kept thumping all over the hardwood floors with his shoes on and when i asked him to take them off (because its 1am and i wake at 5:15!) and he said no. Ugh.

I will start a little list of all the reasons i am excited for him to be gone
-no more complaining about whether i left the heater on after i leave for school
- getting all angry and judgmental about the people who live in my neighborhood
- no need to put my activities onto the calender

And, here we go...... i can have a date stay overnight ;)

I feel a little bad because i am so gosh darned excited for him to be gone.