Shitty day. in Since OD is shutting down....

It’s been a day from hell and I’m glad to be at home. I got my car fixed this morning and rushed home to wait for the UPS guy and finally I called them 30 minutes before I had to leave for work and they gave me some story about how I’m going to have to contact who sold me the treadmill and got another shipping label and blah blah blah. I’ve spent 3 days waiting all day until I have to go to work for nothing. I went off on the lady I talked to for about 20 minutes and get home to the shipping label put under my door so apparently he came after I went to work, yet again. I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do about getting this picked up but unless they come get it, there’s nothing I can do as it’s too heavy for me and it’s not going to fit in my car.

I’ve decided that I’m not going to accept the replacement as I don’t have anyone to assemble it and I’m done begging my brother for help. In fact, I’m going to be changing my number AGAIN and he’s not going to have it. I can’t continue to have a relationship with someone who uses their kid to get at me but doesn’t think they need to help me out EVER and I’m done talking about it, I’m done dealing with it and with my birthday coming up, it’s another reminder that I’m just getting too old for this shit. I can’t deal with this anymore and I’m sorry that his little girl is going to get the shit end of the stick but I’ve been putting up with this shit once again for about 10 months and letting my brother get away with never being there for me for her sake and I just can’t do it anymore.

Then, on top of being angry about shitty customer service from UPS, I get to work and it’s slow as fuck. I get stiffed left and right so finally a few minutes ago, I asked to leave 3 hours early because I had enough. I wasn’t making shit and was just not into being there. Plus that girl that is still giving me the silent treatment was working and I was just not in any fucking mood to put up with it so I dipped the fuck out. I get to be there all day tomorrow and I might work a little over the weekend so I’ll be just fine.

I honesty feel so angry at the world and honestly, just feel defeated. I think it’s bullshit that I can’t have certain things because I can’t get any fucking help from people unless I bug repeatedly or pay them. I’m sick of having no life outside of work because there’s no one to ever hang out with. I start to feel like my only purpose in the world is to work and pay bills.

Oh and I’m completely out of my Belviq now and not sure when I’m going to hear from anyone about getting my refill and how much it’s going to be. I guess I can call tomorrow and leave a message for my nurse but I’m pretty sure they don’t work Fridays so I probably won’t hear anything until at least Monday. Ugh, I’m just so fucking sick of all of this bullshit that I could seriously start crying.

I’ve decided that I’m going to change my number once more in the next couple of days and only people from work are going to have it. I am going to shut everyone else out and maybe deactivate Facebook again. I just feel so alone and like no one fucking cares so I’m just going to be in my own little world for awhile. I am so tired of being alone and getting no type of help in any area of my life that it starts to make me super depressed and angry. I was actually starting to feel better about things when I was able to walk on my treadmill and was starting to get some better numbers on the scale but now I’m gonna just have to pick up and go to the fucking gym provided the temp ever gets over 25 degrees.

I’m too crabby to write any more. Bed time.