Ten Years. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.

So for whatever reason, I spent some time last night looking through old pictures. Those that know me know I speak cryptically about “the before times,” which is basically 2004 and earlier. That means the Modern Timmy Era has existed for ten years. I haven’t shaved in a couple days, so I felt kind of dirty when I looked in the mirror. I shaved this morning and made my beard-now-goatee slightly narrower. I still look young, and I can see how people think I haven’t aged, but I see it. Like, DAMN I had babyface ten years ago.

As retrospective a person as I tend to be, I kind of stopped doing that as much when I met Candi. That’s not bad or good, life was interesting and things were Happening, so I didn’t feel the need to reflect as much. Little things here and then remind me of Candi, and I’m starting to think a strategy of Not Thinking About It might be in order. While I’ve certainly spent the past year pondering our five-year mission (I mean) relationship, I haven’t spent nearly as much time thinking about Before I met her.

2005 was a really good year. That job at Panera put me in a really good headspace. Getting fired was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I started county college of my own accord. I started lifting. I felt attractive. I felt in control. While I know the stretch from 2005 to 2008 wasn’t perfect, thinking about it now is a rather nice headspace. And with the kind of depression I’ve had, I need that kind of good headspace.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking about starting a separate ‘book’ for deliberate decade-hence reflections. Between my Open Diary Final Archive™ and the plethora of pictures, it might be fun to just talk out loud about stuff. And by “stuff”, I mean anything. I’m reminded of a side-OD I had in which I used my carbon journal to do a day-to-day reconstruction of my Junior year of high school. Three Years Hence? Enter Junior Year? I can’t remember what I called it. It was cathartic.

Also, did I mention this was when I got better about taking selfies?

While depression supposedly lends itself to creativity, it doesn’t lend itself to wanting to talk about your day-to-day life. Having a side-project might be good for me. It’s a thought, at least.

Last updated February 18, 2015