Entry 93: Briefly on Theater in Much Ado About Nothing

I’ll try and be brief!
Last night, I went to the theater. On stage were two performers I’ve worked with before and adore - genuinely, the woman singing on stage? If I could do it without seeming like a creepy older man, I would gush to her about how delightful she is on stage and what an amazing energy and character work and glorious pipes… okay, so I’m allowed to be a fan of people I know and have worked with, lol. And the man I know, I ‘ve been in two different shows with him… and when I say different I mean different. He was my Master Ford when I was Falstaff in Merry Wives (so, over the top and filled with oppressive jealousy) and then he was in The Book Club Play as the unwelcome guest who at first offends and then transforms my own character. This is a terrible thing to say but… he’s in his late 20s and reminds me strongly of what I might have become had I not quit acting. You see, he was trained at the same college that gave me an acting scholarship. And while he’s not doing theater professionally (he has a 9 to 5 at an Eye Doctor’s) he still went through and got his degree in Theater and took appropriate advantage of the college’s amenities like voice coaches. So, he dances, sings, acts and is only getting better every year, every performance. Were I the me I was only five or so years ago, I’d likely hate him for all of that; but instead, I’m so happy for him and so pleased with his performances. It is my own damned fault that I left for 15 years and it is my own damned fault that I feel like I’m starting over, re-learning, just hoping that I can keep up in some way with my colleagues. NOT TO MENTION the person directing the show last night was another Theater Colleague of mine and was our Mistress Page in Merry Wives. So massive kudos to her on her directing and on her directing a Musical that was fairly difficult to stage.

But the big thing I wanted to write about here, ironically, is the audition. I say ironically but it is only “ironic” because of what is in my head that I am trying to express. So, until expressed- the concept doesn’t make sense. You see… I have auditioned for.... so many things in my life at this point. And whether professional theater, community theater, School Theater- I have had at least one NO from everywhere. Those who read me regularly might recall that this was actually a concern of mine in Adult Acting: I was waiting for the first NOs and they didn’t come for quite some time. But the NOs are good because (1) one needs to learn how to deal with rejection in the Theater; and (2) IF you really are auditioning for everything you can, you should hear NO because you’re not going to be right for every show. While I think Jeremy Piven is a fine actor and appreciate what he’s done; I’m almost certainly not going to cast him as Romeo now that he’s 59. You’re just not always going to be cast in everything. SO sometimes people ask if I ever get nervous at auditions. And I always say, “Yes, for musicals, 100%. I’m still so timid about my voice!” BECAUSE EVERY YEAR I FORGET how nervous Shakespeare Auditions make me. Because I haven’t heard a NO from Shakespeare and I never want to!! When I was still with Hermia who, granted, seriously could not handle a Theater No… she had said the only Theater No she’s ever worried about for me is if it comes from Shakespeare. And she was right to worry. Shakespeare is what brought me back to life after the Pandemic. Shakespeare is what re-focused my heart and saved me. If I can’t at least help in some way to bring Shakespeare to this area every year? I may… that may be a challenging time for me! So, I DO get nervous for Shakespeare… but forget I do!

It didn’t help that, in the car, I was trying to figure out why it felt so weird. And then I realized it. This is the very first Shakespeare Audition since my first one where I’m coming in without having done a show previously this year. 2022, I did Rocky Horror AND Clue before Shakespeare. 2023, I did Murder at the Howard Johnson’s before Shakespeare. 2024, I did The Book Club Play before Shakespeare. 2025? I haven’t done a show yet! Shakespeare if I get in would be my first show all year! Which is NOT a generous thought walking into an audition. Prior to the audition, I fill out my info card and conflicts calendar. Talk a bit with some friends and directors that are in the room. And then as I walk to the Audition Space, every ounce of moisture flees my mouth. I’m in cotton mouth, “Can get a drink?” mode the moment my feet hit the black wood of the Black Box Theater. I do my best. I honestly do my best in the audition but can tell you right now that I went to the White Room so.... here’s just… hoping! The director asked if there were any parts I’d especially be interested in. OF COURSE the answer is BENEDICK but I couldn’t say that as I rather doubt I’d be the best choice for that particular role (though would certainly enjoy the hell out of the part, were I cast there!) I mentioned my love for the play, my respect for all characters, how so much of how I hear the play in my head is from Kenneth Branagh’s version such that, though I try not to, Dogberry may honestly always be Michael Keaton to me! And that was it. That was the audition.

The director said that it is always really hard for her to figure out who to cast where so it might take a full week to hear back.
For me? While I expect Antonio, I would be thrilled with anything. It’s the… if I don’t get in that could really do a number on me!!