2019-2024 in My Bio

There isn’t much left of 2024, and if you’re wondering why I’m cramming half a decade into a single post, it’s because I didn’t do the greatest job documenting the highlights of my life other than in journals after 2018. Starting next year, I’m going to get back on track with that. I’ll go back to tweeting about what’s happening and include the more important events in my yearly reviews.

For now, I’ll highlight everything that comes to mind, although it might not necessarily be in chronological order. I figured that if something doesn’t come to mind, then it wasn’t very important.

In late 2019, I finally gave my sister and her equally twisted offspring a piece of my mind regarding their lying, narcissistic, toxic ways. They ended up threatening, stalking, harassing, and cyberbullying me for a few months afterward. I had a shitty phone with no blocking capability back then, so I had to get a new number.

I totally regret letting them back into my life and never will again under any circumstances. No amount of apologies, promises, or rewards could ever get me to change my mind! I’m almost embarrassed it took me so long to learn that people really don’t change. They may claim they have, and they may seem different at first, but don’t let wishful thinking distort reality! The way she treated me when I lived near her should have been lesson enough. I should have known better than to take her back after what she and her ex put me through in Maricopa and the grief she and her brats caused me in Auburn. That was a truly dumb move on my part.

Thanks to her example, her daughters have followed in her footsteps. It was when I realized I was ashamed to be their aunt that I knew I wanted nothing to do with them or their mother. The way they treated me was utterly appalling. Quite often, our true family isn’t bound by DNA.

Because of the close connection and the discomfort it caused, I decided to make a clean break from all family members, including those I had never had a problem with. I felt a bit of guilt about my extended family, but I knew that sometimes we have to prioritize ourselves. It was time to start doing what I had failed to do for years.

My first cousins were already ghosting me, so there were no ties to cut there. I tried reaching out to Lori and Lisa, but I got nothing but radio silence in return. Nothing from Polly, and Phil went quiet on me after a few message exchanges.

COVID-19 began spreading, and my husband was laid off in early 2020. It turned out to be perfect timing since he wouldn’t risk getting sick, especially since it would be over a year before we could get vaccinated. He collected unemployment and then retired at 62.

We realized it was an ideal time to move once the vaccine became available, and I realized my strong feelings about not staying until he was over 65 actually meant something.

The beginning of 2021 was horrible. My beloved friend Aly was hospitalized with numerous symptoms, including constant coughing, swelling in her legs, and more. By then, we had grown very close and loved each other like sisters. We had planned to meet the previous year because she and her boyfriend were going to visit California, but COVID and her illness changed that.

Before being hospitalized, she had been misdiagnosed with Crohn’s disease. It was later confirmed she had a mass on her ovary. I felt absolutely horrible for her. She was a true magnet for cancer, having already battled breast cancer in both breasts and undergone a double mastectomy before she turned 30. Now, at just 40, she had to undergo surgery to remove the mass. During the operation, her bowel was perforated, and she required a stoma.

My heart broke as we exchanged messages on Skype like we had nearly every day for over a year. She told me she’d heard of people beating the odds but couldn’t see herself being one of them. Soon after, she messaged me saying her stoma had become infected, and she was being rushed back into surgery. Then came her final message in early May, one I’ll never forget: I’m going to die. All they’re doing is giving me comfort care. This sucks. I’ve hardly lived. I hope my parents’ neighbor can figure out my phone to let you know when it happens.

At first, I chalked it up to her feeling shitty and being in a bad mood because of it. But when a day passed without word, I started to worry. After two days, I knew something was wrong. Sure enough, her neighbor texted me, fulfilling Aly’s request to notify me. She had developed sepsis due to the infection, and her body was too weak to fight it. I have missed her SO much ever since!

Also, Stephan’s (Steve) brother says he died around the same time, but I could never find any obituary or grave listing. I wondered if it was true or if he was just saying that. Before this, I found a number for Stephan in Massachusetts and called, only to end up speaking with a very hostile woman I suspect might have been his wife. He must have been there in the room with her because she told him I was someone he knew in the ’90s before telling me he wasn’t coming to the phone. I felt a bit hurt, as I had wondered about him for many years, always wishing we could reconnect. So, I’m not sure if he really died or not, but if he did, that’s a really sad thought. I wonder if it could have been COVID.

I also found and reached out to Nissan on Facebook, but she never replied. Same thing with a few other people, including Randy, the really friendly mailman up in Oregon. I learned his last name from another mail carrier who forwarded my info to Randy. All he did was Google me. He never actually reached out.

I informed Kim and Molly of Aly’s passing. Molly’s mother passed away a few years prior. I felt a little bad for Molly, but otherwise, I didn’t feel bad at all considering how much the mother was in on the bullying I endured years ago.

Kim was no longer allowed online as her sister finally caught on that she was stalking, harassing, and impersonating people. So I got the word to her through her sister, who still has custody of her. Kim had a phone but no browser installed. She only had an email provider. We exchanged emails nearly every day until she ghosted me for agreeing with her sister regarding her obsessive nature. As with Paula, I was mostly glad she dumped me because she was a pain in the ass to deal with. Her sister said she was autistic and the equivalent of a 5-year-old. While I understood that she couldn’t help the way she was, I was also sick of the stupidity, the repetition, and the blatant lies that I knew she damn well knew she was telling. She still had a basic understanding of right and wrong. So no, I don’t miss the mile-long emails telling me the same shit over and over.

Not that I care to connect with Molly regularly since she too had her share of mental and emotional problems and was mostly overly clingy, Kathy and I noticed that she no longer seemed to have an online presence.

Yes, Kathy. I reached out to her and we reconnected after more than a decade. Other than that, I tried to no longer reach out to those who don’t reach out to me first. I figure, why should it always be me to make the first move? Let someone else show how much they care for once and reach out to me first.

After 29 years in the West, we left California and moved to Florida in July of 2021. We moved into a smaller home in a quieter, more rural area. It’s not perfect—there are more planes than I’d like—but it’s a million times better than the old park. I only hear landscaping once a week, and I don’t hear tons of projects. The water is on consistently, and there is little loud traffic. What I do hear is mostly motorcycles. Some of the neighbors I like, some I don’t, and some I don’t even know. I avoid people for the most part, not just because I’m not sociable to begin with, but because there are so many conservatives here. Yeah, people do have the right to their own beliefs and opinions, but I don’t really fancy the idea of hanging with anti-gay, anti-Jew, anti-women God fantasizers.

I consider myself agnostic—not sure if there is a God or not—but leaning more towards atheism for a variety of reasons. I just feel like I’m a little too old to have an imaginary friend that hasn’t been proven scientifically in any way. I also don’t buy a lot of the shit in the Bible. Never have, never will.

Another thing I like about the place is that many of the homes, including the one to one side of us and across the street, are empty half of the year because there are many snowbirds from the North, including Canada.

We were surprised to learn that there’s a dry season and a wet season. The rainy months are mostly July, August, and September. It’s not as humid during the other months, and they only mow every other week at that time. I hate it when the summer thunderstorms wake me up, but I love the storms otherwise. It gets a little nerve-wracking during hurricane season, though. There are more power outages here, even when it’s not storming.

The house is a little newer, built in 1990, and not as big as I’d like at around 1,000 square feet. It’s a cute little place, though. A place with a little more space would be nice, especially since we’ve gotten totally addicted to virtual reality. Since it’s humid here a lot of the time and treadmills are boring, it would be really hard to push myself to work out if it weren’t for VR. I use a glider to travel the world. It’s an app that lets you travel wherever Google Street View has mapped. Plus, he and I play miniature golf every day. I also have a meditation app, boxing, and other things.

I’ve been addicted to all things AI since it hit the scene big time in 2023. I swear I must ask ChatGPT millions of questions every day! It’s great for double-checking the correctness of my journals and stories as well.

I’m not impressed with the healthcare and the people in general here. They just don’t seem as friendly. Rarely can I bitch about slow drivers holding us up either. They drive like maniacs here, and there are always accidents. Always.

My health has gotten better, but then it hasn’t. It seems I always have problems. I’m fully menopausal now, so much of the anxiety has backed off, which is good, but I still have trouble sleeping and was even diagnosed with sleep apnea.

I’ve also had a tooth pulled, my dental bridge replaced, and my gallbladder removed. Currently, at the end of 2024, I have nasal issues interfering with my sleep, along with a few other things. My biggest problem these last few years has been fatigue. My first go with the CPAP was a fail, but now I’m getting desperate enough to use it once I get another one.

For many years I’ve believed that 4 is a very unlucky number, and 2024 is definitely not ending well. Hopefully, next year I can get my nasal issues (collapsed nasal valve?) and sleep apnea dealt with so I can finally have some decent energy. Fingers crossed!