Almost Habit Forming in Book One: The Not So Daily Briefs 2014

Wow… I don’t know what it is; usually I don’t feel such a desire to simply WRITE but lately? If I had to guess, I would guess that my desire to write comes from my feeling of being cut off from the academic and intellectual world. Reading and writing were two hugely fundamental aspects of my life for the past 20 years and to NOT have to write? Feels very strange. But… honestly? I think that bodes well for my Bar Exam study. Last time… I had just finished law school. The last thing I wanted to do was to spend 30 hours a day (I know the math doesn’t work, go with it) reading extensive legal rules and writing 20 essays a day about how Plaintiff Mary should/should not sue Defendant Tom because of an easement dispute on land jointly entered into by their grandparents than defeased to their parents but split between siblings through divorce; than inherited by Mary and Tom who are legally estranged. Okay… that was difficult for me to follow writing it down… and that is an example of a SIMPLE essay prompt for the bar. So… yeah. I wasn’t really in the mood to spend the time necessary to study last time. This time? Between work, the wife, and the fact that most of my law school friends have moved away? Oh yeah. I’m chomping at the bit to get started studying.

By the way- I did not post my Tuna Disaster last night because… oh my. I don’t know what I expected but… not what I got. I expected a standalone dish… something that could be eaten as is. That is not what I got. Instead, I got something that is best suited as sandwich filling. Which would be fine and dandy but… my wife has pretty much kept bread OUT of this house for the last 9 months. Not that it has helped motivate her to cook or eat better; as was her excuse as to why we couldn’t buy bread anymore. SO… when I hit the store today, I’ll buy bread and some finer fruit juices (trying to work on cocktail recipes again). Maaaaaybe I’ll try another Slow Cooker Recipe tonight, too.

NOTE: WHAT FOLLOWS MAY BE CONSIDERED EXPLICIT AND/OR SEXUALLY GRAPHIC. IF SUCH CONTENT OFFENDS YOU; PLEASE SKIP TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH.

My day started… oddly. I woke up with no recollection of what I had dreamt but… I awoke to the hardest, longest erection I’ve had in quite some time. It didn’t hurt or anything… but… (exaggerated for humor) I was like “That part isn’t supposed to touch my knee!” I have no idea how or why it got there. My only guess is that, as I have been rather busy lately, I have not masturbated in a few days. And, yes, frequently that is all it takes is a few days. Now, here’s the thing… my wife knows I masturbate. Hell, I hope that she would WANT me to considering we’ve had sex less than 10 times in our entire marriage… I mean, imagine what I would be like if I had to rely exclusively on my wife for any and all sexual stimulation. She would have divorced me and filed a restraining order, lol. So she knows I masturbate. But out of courtesy, I never masturbate while she is in the apartment. It is not a “hide my shame” element or anything but… she doesn’t want to see me do that. That isn’t an assumption, either. We’ve discussed it because… seeing a woman pleasure herself absolutely turns me on, so we discussed how we both react to that sort of visual stimulation. However… the giant flesh-sword (lol) in my sweatpants was NOT going to let me go back to sleep… or… really do anything until I dealt with the situation. Conundrum. Ultimately, I took care of the issue. But when my wife woke up, I “confessed” and apologized. She was okay with it. Her words were “I was asleep, and it didn’t wake me up; so it’s okay.” Is it terrible of me that I wish her response had been “Next time, wake me up and we’ll take care of it together?”

After handling that little issue; I looked over my to-do list today and promptly did not do it. Oh, the list will be done by sundown easily. But… I tend not to work on my to-do lists until my wife leaves for the day. As I was screwing around with video games this morning, I tried to figure out why that is and I think I’ve realized it. It is about criticism. Not that she is DEFINITELY going to criticize how I do things but… well, all the other chores I do when she’s around, she criticized me for… so now I just don’t do them when she’s here. For instance, I’ll do the laundry… but I won’t fold. After all, when I folded laundry… she’d take the laundry out of the closet/shelves; fold the clothes HER way; then put them back. So… if she’s going to do that? I won’t even bother. So I waited for her to leave for work before starting on my Saturday Chore List.

First… I cleaned the toilet. In no other place that I have lived has this project been so detailed. I’m almost 100% sure we have hard water issues and some VERY funky sediment issues with our water. These issues tend to make the toilet into… well… something out of a horror movie in that the water looks terrible, the bowl is stained, and it looks rancid. Sadly, it has nothing to do with how we use the facilities… it is strictly the water and plumbing. BUT… that means I can’t just Tidy Bowl and flush like I did every where else. I get full-on Dexter’s Mom and have to get in there with a hand scrubber.

After completing that task; I washed my hands and arms. Put on a fresh pair of yellow scrubber gloves; and set to work hand washing the dishes. There are several cooking items, collector’s glasses, and decorative items we use in this house that need to be hand washed. I take that job as I usually have more time to do it. Especially after using the Crock Pot, that job is important (if for no other reason than because our kitchen is TINY and clearing counter space is a must.)

Dishes hand-washed, rinsed, dried, and placed back in their proper places; I scrubbed the kitchen counters a bit and set to work on the recycling and trash. I grew up in Iowa. Iowa has LOADS of recycling programs including, but not limited to, “refund recycle” programs. If you ever buy a soda can and it says 5c deposit… that is what I’m talking about. Iowa charges 5 cents extra per can; then pays that 5 cents back to you if you recycle that can. It is kind of a “recycle tax” to encourage recycling and/or pay for things if folks don’t recycle. Nebraska doesn’t have that. It is… more of an active task to try to recycle. Honestly, a little upsetting. I don’t want to have a Global Warming discussion (because I tend to piss off BOTH sides of that argument) but a basic and obvious tenant is: We should take care of where we live. This means doing what is possible to decrease the excess in landfills. If for no other reason than simply that landfills take up a lot of LAND. Land, or real property, is extremely valuable is there is only a finite amount.

SO… finally through with Toilet Cleaning, Hand Washing Dishes, Recycling, and Taking Out Trash… it is time to go shopping… again. Damned… needing things that cost money. AND… damned… functioning border-line alcoholism. Tonight I am going to try to perfect a “Hobo Bahama Mama.” Basically… and this is the trick… it is a Bahama Mama done as cheaply as possible. It is a trick because the drink has to look and taste the same… but the ingredients can’t be over a certain amount of money. Yes… I do enjoy creating games for myself like this. Hell, I’m still puzzling the hell out of how to make “Smilex” and that is simply a drink I dreamt up for a possible Batman Theme Party that may or may not ever happen.

Hrmmm… On second thought… maybe I’ll try that Honey BBQ Pork Chop recipe tomorrow. I don’t really feel like being up until midnight cooking.