Or should I call you by name, Imp? in Book One: The Not So Daily Briefs 2014

It is weird that I feel the desire to write; but I’ve not a great deal to say. So… I suppose bare with the long and winding road of my random?

This morning, I had two… particularly political dreams, strangely. The first was a Global Warming Apocalypse. It was 104 degrees in the middle of the United States in Winter. That… is truly a nightmare; as I prefer the cold. I am much more a Mr. Freeze than a Firefly. But the second dream… a bit weirder. My friends (many of whom volunteer for the DNC) were hosting a Presidential Address. My parents were there, especially my mom (lovely woman, but tends to be naïve sometimes.) We were discussing how to introduce the President and I said that it should be easy. “Simply say: Ladies and Gentlemen, I am proud to introduce the 44th President of the United State- Barack Hussein Obama!” My mom freaked out and started saying how we can’t say Hussein. I argued (this is awesome, cuz this really all did come from my dream) that using full names or middle initials has a long history. Rutherford B. Hayes, William Jefferson Clinton, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt. She got frustrated and left. Then President Obama approached and said how he was so proud of my friends and I for putting everything together. He said it was our demographic… the young 18 to 35s… that got him into office. So I point-blank asked “IF we’re so important; how come that is the demographic still experiencing the most hardship, economic struggle, and college loan extortion?” He simply wrote the word “Trayvon” on a blackboard and left. WEIRD!

Work… sucked. Sucked hard! The individual who was supposed to go to court this morning? Didn’t show up. The individual who was supposed to get the paperwork prepared for afternoon court? Didn’t show up. So… I got to stand in front of one of the FEW judges that actually give a damn about our office and say, “With apologies to the court, Your Honor, we have no information to submit.” I had to say that a lot. And then after court, do all the paperwork that was supposed to get done before my shift started. GUH. I would have been super pissed at Brook, as it was her shifts that were missed… but she told us all that she was out of town this week. So… mergh. A job without accountability (not surprisingly) created a supervisor that doesn’t do his job, doesn’t care about his job… and leaves people like me (people with seniority that are looking for legitimate legal work) to pick up the pieces. So… work sucked.

I came home and really wanted to try this recipe I’ve been looking at. It is a Tuna Salad Casserole dish. Of course… I added too much Tuna; cut the celery too thickly, and didn’t have enough eggs… so we’ll see how it turns out. I may post pictures of it in a FRIENDS ONLY journal. Why friends only? Cuz… my sister-in-law just posted one of THE most adorable pictures of my niece and everyone should see her… but I still don’t trust random internet strangers entirely.

As it is cooking; I’ve been watching a new anime “Madoka Magic.” I’m guessing I’ll finish what Netflix Instant has for it before I’m done with everything for the night. Then back to Destiny to try to prepare for raiding and hard modes. Some of those daily/weekly bounties are pretty intense.

My wife is going to a party tonight. I was invited as well but… well. I was invited by the host, not by my wife. When I asked if my wife wanted me to come… she said she didn’t really care. And I guess… I don’t want to go to a party where I don’t know anybody if my wife, the one person I would know, doesn’t care if I’m there or not. Maybe I’m being childish but… that’s just how I feel.

Speaking of my wife… drifting off to sleep at a truly ungodly hour (seriously, it was past 4) The Others was on TV. Nicole Kidman looks damned good in that movie… Nicole Kidman looks damned good all the time! And, uh… my wife noticed something I’ve known for a while. She looked at Nicole Kidman and said… “She looks like Elizabeth. Like… the spitting image!” She does. In The Others especially, Nicole Kidman looks exactly like Elizabeth. And so I told my wife… “And yet she hated herself… hated everything about herself. So maybe everyone should be nicer to themselves… go easier on themselves.”

Just… something to say, I suppose. Of course… thinking about it makes me want to retread the whole thing over again. Write the story of Emily, Shannon, Elizabeth, and Nancy… ESEN… all over again. Trying to put in all of the details; trying to say everything about everything. I’ll likely be trying to tell that story for the rest of my life… trying to find the correct narrative; the proper words; the version of the story that is most accurate, most honest, and most… readable. I’ve told the Caitlin story until my voice cracked… and that would be the only other story worth sharing. The story of my abuser and introduction to sexuality; followed by ESEN and everything that happened therein.

Last updated October 26, 2014