Too Many Eggs + My Life in Days of My Destiny

Our chickens started laying eggs regularly, and quite suddenly we were left with a thousand eggs that we had no idea what to do with (other than bake cookies and cakes). Two dozen went to school, another dozen I have just used to make Crack'an'Egg Pies with, and we still are left with a dozen and then some. Crazy. It's a matter of staying on top of it all though, and besides, these eggs are a great blessing. Vege patch is looking lovely. The coriander is looking more like a mini-bush now and I'm getting better at spontaneously remembering to use it in my meal preparations. We also have rosemary. Actual veges include garden peas, carrots and onion. Not sure exactly when I am supposed to pick these but I think it's in another month or so. Next time I plant something I'll write it in the calendar so I know when to pick lol.

Lately I've been getting over the shift work side of things. It really plays up with your sex life, and that's frustrating. Without shift work, a couple might feel like having sex at different times as it is, but without shift work, you can usually convince the other person to enjoy a bit of a romp. With shift work thrown in the mix, oh my goodness.... it's like, when I feel like it, he's not even here! Sometimes he might come home wanting it, but I'm OUT of it completely! And then....... when we are on a shift that WOULD work - I get my fucking period. It's just frustrating and it's been pissing me off lately.

I found out yesterday that my cousin Leo is going to be a dad. His mum put it on facebook. I haven't been in touch with Leo for a couple of years now (we used to be quite close), and I haven't been on fb much at all. My reasons - I just want to go back to how life was pre-facebook. I will keep in touch with the ones who matter. I was kind of annoyed that I even had to go on it to find out what time a playgroup thing was on in town (it's on at different times each week so nobody actually ever knows when it's on), and then the first thing I see in my newsfeed is that he's going to be a dad. Part of me is unaffected, another part of me is happy for him, another part of me is annoyed that I found out through facebook. But oh well, good on him. I am sure it wasn't planned, but I do know it's something he did want eventually in his life, so that is good.

We've had lousy internet lately, really really slow, all because I watched a few youtube videos of some songs I want to learn on guitar. So that's that. The new month rolls tomorrow so that'll be good. Prosebox is ideal in these times because it's a website with a nice easy simple layout, meaning the page actually loads, lol.

Tonight I'm going to Battle PT again (the training run by the ex-military guy), and I'm spending the day getting organized for that - cooking dinner, packing what I need etc - last week was just an insane rush right at the end and I didn't like that. I hate rushing, it just makes me anxious. My breathing goes shallow and stays that way for quite some time after supposedly calming down. I get that a bit actually, sometimes I wander if I live with a super mild case of anxiety. I do focus on my breathing but it creeps up in unexpected situations. Sometimes out of nothing. I haven't ever told anyone. I mentioned it to L the other week and he seemed really worried. I don't feel like he should worry. It's something I've always had I think, and something I have only just been able to put into words. It's not something I am worried about right now, as long as I know how to deal with it and be proactive about it, I don't need to see anyone for help.

I've also had weird dreams lately, to do with evil spirits and things. I get a bit of fear of a night time, and sense bad spirits about, but I feel like.... it's only something that exists if I allow myself to really delve into the thoughts and feelings about it. Last night I actually thought about bad spirits vs the Holy Spirit. I'd much rather think about the latter, and honestly I felt peaceful once I thought about the Holy Spirit.

I'm reading a devotional that was given to me at church the other day (I've gone two weeks in a row now) and it's called Woman of God. Usually I find these devotionals quite basic, with simple questions and straightforward answers. So I was surprised last night to see that this one has actually had some thought put into it. It asks good questions that make you reflect and evaluate the way you see yourself and life. So I'm happy with it. There's a women's only bible study group on Monday nights. I went twice when I first moved here and never went back because the lady who ran it was authoritative and kept criticising the book we were working off and it just put me off. It wasn't what I needed or wanted at all. Anyway that lady has now moved (she was the minister's wife and they were both my-way-or-the-highway type of leaders, which never works) and I know the lady who has taken over. In the two weeks I've been to church lately, I can sense a much more relaxed atmosphere there, like the people feel like they can be more themselves. It's a positive thing for sure, and anyhow it encourages me to go to the bible study next Monday night. I feel like I might actually get something out of it now.

My days are filled with simple things that I enjoy. A walk with my youngest daughter; collecting flowers; feeding the animals and talking to them; baking. It's beautiful.