My family. in Since OD is shutting down....

I had to work until 10:30 last night because someone was about to walk out because they are sick of doing all the dishes by themselves even though they have told people they don’t want help. I was disgusted by this person but had to stay and do a bunch of them just so they would stop trying to quit. I could care less about them as a human being because they are mean and cocky but we need people so I stayed for awhile. It was kind of hard to get up this morning. I went to my Medical Terminology class and got so much done once I got home and studied. I still need to study more but I got my review and flashcards done so now I just need to make sure I study and know the words I need to for the test next Tuesday.

I got home a while ago and spent about an hour an a half getting all my stuff done. I’m going to try as hard as I can to get good grades. I was studying and my Mom called to tell me that my little brother failed his drivers test and was flipping out, being mean and was breaking shit. I don’t agree with him breaking shit and being an asshole because he failed his test but I do understand why he acts out like that. My little brother was never allowed a life outside of the house and hasn’t had much of a social outlet so he’s not a regular kid. He can’t read as well as he should be able to at 19 and I’m scared he’s never going to be able to get his drivers license. I’m angry that my Dad has never allowed him a life outside of the house and that’s why things are fucked up.

I’m pissed that they call and interrupt me doing my homework with their drama and negative bullshit. I even told them I was studying! I have this new thing where I say to them, “I don’t know what to tell ya” because I just don’t care to hear their negative shit anymore. None of it is ever going to change and I don’t want my day ruined because they have these problems yet they do nothing to fix them. I got hung up on by my Dad after I told him that my little brother didn’t want to sit on the couch and watch tv all day and he asked if I was blaming him and I said, “absolutely” and then I got hung up on. My Dad is the sole reason why everything is a fucking mess and I just don’t care to sugarcoat it! I just think it’s complete bullshit that they always have to be trying to bring other people down with their problems and negativity instead of actually trying to rectify things so that people could actually stand them!

I’ve had a lot of my own troubles and have my fair share of negative as well but now that things are going pretty good and I’m settled into my routine, I just can’t expose myself to my parents issues, negativity, and pessimistic outlook more than once a week! It’s like if I talk to them too much, I can feel myself getting depressed and down and that’s not okay because I don’t have much to be depressed or down about anymore. I just want to live my life, do what I gotta do and just strive to be the best person I can be. I’m sorry that my parents love to sit around and wallow in self pity but I refuse to let them drag me down too!!! I just don’t feel like they respect the fact that I’m not in the mindset of pessimism and negativity. Just because that’s how they want to live their lives doesn’t mean they need to reflect it on me or anyone else!

I’m super tired since I didn’t get to bed until a little after midnight and had to be up at 7:30 this morning. I have to get up about that time every morning which really isn’t that horrible, provided I get to bed at a decent hour which means i need to be able to get to bed at a reasonable time and if they think they are going to keep me at work until 10:30 or 11 every night, I will text the boss and say something about it. They need to keep the people who don’t have to study or be up early to do that bullshit. Plus after 4 or 5 hours, I’m tired and ready to go home. Last night I was just exhausted by the time I got to bed and I will become a really big bitch if I’m not getting off work by 10pm from here on out. I don’t give a fuck how short staffed we are or the fact that people don’t pitch in! I shouldn’t have to suffer because of other people!

I was able to get all my laundry done yesterday. I also did the dishes and organized some stuff in the living room. It sucks that I just don’t have the time to keep my house as clean as it used to be. It’s frustrating when I don’t have clean dishes and don’t have the time or energy to wash them. I do enjoy being busy knowing that every day I work and go to school, I’m bettering my life and my situation.

Don’t have much more to talk about so I’m going to lay down watch some tv and just relax before work.