Mindset Reset in Current Events

I feel wrecked from my nap. I knew that I would because I ate right before. I will be extra groggy in the morning if I eat late as well. I knew better but I had to eat. I barely touched the food I brought to work. It was a successful depression nap though. I feel better. I mentioned that I needed a bed day but I just needed an hour.

When I’m in a bad mood at work, some people think I’m mad at them. I’m just quiet. It’s noticeable because I have such a strong presence every other day. My supervisor gave me some space and tiptoed around me. My old supervisor would have pulled me into the office to see what my problem was which made me feel like I was not allowed to just be quiet. Like I’m supposed to be a court jester for everybody. That’s just me taking everything personally.

I was talking with Cathy, I told her about my crisis list and she asked if I was able to just go back home. This is some magical thing some people can do. They can stay with their parents while they go to school or when they need to save up for something. That would be nice. My mother wouldn’t let me live on the streets but it’s not just her decision as she lives with her boyfriend who likes his space. She isn’t even allowed to move anything in that house. His late wife decorated it. It’s complicated. Cathy then realized the privilege she was giving her son. He used to work with us, he’s a nice kid. An old soul, his mother calls him. He’s just a Capricorn. He’s an aspiring tattoo artist. His work is very good.

The way things are accidentally manifesting, I need to stop thinking about money and start thinking about success. I remembered that I am the sole beneficiary of my mother’s life insurance and will. I’m on her boyfriend’s as well. I do not want that! NOPE. I worry about them because they keep getting their boosters. They’re slowly poisoning themselves to death and there is no reasoning with people like them.

Another one is Helen, she is a full-timer at my work. An old-timer who is sick. She’s not deathly ill but she just started having issues that her doctors just threw antibiotics at. She’s a ticking timebomb. I want a full-time position but not that way. I really need to be mindful of what I am wishing for.

Whatever is on your consciousness, that’s all you’re going to see. I learned that lesson a long time ago. I need to be thinking about opportunities so that all I will see are opportunities. On that note, because I am stressed out about my hair falling out I can see alopecia everywhere. Is it just me or can anyone else see that young people everywhere are losing their hair? Even women. I see it most rampant among east asian women. It’s like everybody took an experimental gene therapy and shot their liver and ended up with that autoimmune disease. $cience hasn’t said anything about it so I’m sureit’s fine. They have the answers to everything.

Doing things my way is not working too well. I think it is high time that I start taking other people’s advice. Practice gratitude, yoga, meditation, get laid, etc. Speaking of which, I had a dream about Mason, the eye candy I mentioned the other day with whom I had an embarrassing encounter. The dream was innocent. It wasn’t hard to interpret either. Apparently, I was just really impressed to see him have a personality. He’s actually my neighbour. He lives a few houses down from my building. Guys his age give me little brother vibes. He’s working to become an athletic therapist. It’s some physio stuff. I can tell he has a sports injury because of his walk but I don’t want to ask about it. He looks very athletic so I assume he played some sport. I’m not into sports, not into watching them at least. Playing them is fun. I respect anyone who works hard to develop a skill though.

I helped my sister with her car drop-off again. It’s a long story. Seeing that big grin on my nephew’s face when he saw me made my day. I would have stayed to visit but I had to come home to nap and then study. My sister is going to keep my niece home the rest of the week because she has a nasty cough that comes out of nowhere. She doesn’t want to be stuck in the position of having to pick her up from school when she doesn’t have a vehicle. My sister is worried about it. I’m worried about my niece as well. I suggested she give her a hot bath in baking soda. Epsom salt if she has any. Help sweat it out. There is an old trick where you can put half an onion in her sock overnight. The pores on our feet are the largest and the onion will pull toxins out that way as well. The skin is a detox organ. I pretended I had extra chromosomes and said it would help get rid of the virus. Of course, I’m not superstitious and I don’t agree to believe in virus possession because no virus has ever been isolated and no medical study has ever successfully replicated disease with a virus. The body removes waste and repairs damage, that’s it. We need to support the symptoms. I wouldn’t be able to talk my sister into taking a break from dairy for her daughter so I didn’t bother. It stimulates mucus growth. It does this because dairy is for heifers and that is just one of the jobs of a mother’s milk.

It’s very hard to witness everybody self-harm with what they put in, on and around their bodies. My sister uses Airwick and scented everything. Parfum has petroleum. People are putting that on their skin, in their hair, on their clothes, spraying their homes with it, putting it on every surface, in their cars. It’s everywhere. Then they get ‘dis eased.

Anyway, I am highly caffeinated and ready to cram some studying in. Back to my flashcards!