Fuck It Era in Current Events

I remember being in my fuck you era just a few months ago. I gave zero shits about anything and I was able to tackle everything head on without overthinking or second guessing. That’s some glorious Aries energy right there that I wish I could capture. I was also a little combative but I kept it together. I think that was when Mars entered Scorpio. Which is a return for my chart. Had a new moon in Scorpio on Monday, if I’m not mistaken. Also another return for my chart. That fuck you era was a nice reprieve from my fuck me era where I usually reside. The overthinking and over analyzing self-sabotaging bullshit. Today, I can feel myself slipping into a fuck it era which sums up how I feel about everything right now. Just fuck it bone dry and deal with the consequences later.

I am rumbling with myself right now about going to class tonight. I am not that prepared. I fell behind on Tuesday because I did not go. I still don’t feel like going. I just want to not care about anything or anyone right now. Can I afford that? I can. Just a little bit but I would have to work my ass off on the weekend because Tuesday is my test.

What I also really want to do is call in sick at work tomorrow. I want a day off from life altogether. Just have one day to myself. All I need is time a moment that is mine. To quote an ancient cringe song. What would that day look like? My roommate would not be home. I would have a day to myself without having to be mindful of anyone. She’s actually going to be house sitting for a friend for 6 weeks soon enough. I can’t wait. Literally… I’m so close I can taste it and it hurts. To be honest, I don’t feel the greatest. I had a congestion headache this morning and I ain’t been the same since. I’m doing a mild lung detox so my sinuses have been fairly active. Go figure.

My problem is that I ain’t been getting enough sleep. That’s an easy fix. Sort of. I’m also stressed about the status of my position at work. Still no word about either of the two. Then there is my studies. I could do better. I need to spend an entire day doing it. That’s going to be this weekend for sure. No excuses. I’ll still go to the gym and run my errands but that’s it.

I’ll likely force myself to go to class because I will spiral into a mini depression if I don’t. This is one of those things where I should put on my big boy pants and do what I don’t feel like doing. I don’t want to lose any pay tomorrow either. The world wins, I lose!

What a waste of an entry lol. I just want to go to the gym and do hot girl shit. It snowed hard this morning and I was praying that my class would be cancelled but it’s been a glorious day since noon. Makes me sick!