What Is it About Me You Really Dislike? in Me Being Me

So far this has been a really trying year for me especially with the issues of my living arrangements. I have realized that because of the mold and the mildew and musty smell as long as it doesn’t get fixed I will be feeling the way I am so I have decided that I am going to do whatever it takes for me to feel like I use to feel and be happy. I asked her last night if the laundry room windows can be opened becasue they are stuck and won’t open and she said “I would rather not” So I figure because it would have been something that could be done that didn’t cost any money and I would get fresh air and not smell the mold or the must I could start to feel much better and then I can start cleaning this place as best as I can.
I think not many people like me because I have noticed that people are blocking me becasue I have the same complaints everyday and it looks like I am doing nothing about it. But the truth is I do try and I do ask the authorities what needs to be done and how to get her to fix things. But because She says this is her house and I have no rights because I don’t live her or pay rent she doesn’t have to do anything and she also tells me if I do try to do things she will evict me even before I get to defend myself.
So since I woke up today which was about 4 am I opened the laundry room door and it smells so refreshing and the musty smell seems to be gone. And i do feel a bit better.
I have done a lot of reading and it seems like my IBS and my headaches are contributing to the mold and the mildew and the must smell so i am going to see if the door being opened will help. Everytime I talk to my doctor I ask him if it’s because of the must smell and mildew that I have these medicle issues and he really doesn’t know. So the next step is I am going to ask to be tested and see what comes out of that.
But I am really sick and tired of being told no for simple fixit things when there is no other option. She won’t even get educated about what I am feeling and see for herslf that she is somewhat wrong.
I told hubby tody to educate himself when I say things like I think the mold and mildew and musty smell is affecting me and if i am wrong to pelase tell me. But I do try to show him what I have found and he pays no attention to it so I am thinking if he looks it up himeslt then he will see that it’s the same thing I told him before.
I don’t mind being wrong even though I do try to be right and perfect all the time but I know that might never happen.
I have had people block me because they think and they are probally right that I compalin and never do anything but the truth is I do and I don’t always say that I have done it so people just assume. But then why is it okay for them to compalin what they are going through and I can’t? And then when I suggest something they get all mad and think I am being rude or mean and block me?
Everything all of you say I really appreciate it and do try to ask but I always get a NO and it’s my house and you will be evicted if you do this or that so what other option do i have? I can’t move because I just don’t have the money to do that right now and besides there is no where to move to.
I figure that if you are writing something here and you are afreaid of hearing or reading what someone is saying and you get all hurt then you need to get a thicker skin because it’s only one persons thought and in the end it really doesn’t matter what they say because you make the final choice of what to do or not do. And besides I am talking from life experiances and becasue I am older I know what I am saying and if i don’t I try to find the right answer.
Anyways this is what I wanted to say..if you hate me now that is okay but to tell me i am rude or inconsiderate is not right because I am not intending to be anything but helpful.

Last updated November 09, 2023