How can you hate someone so much? in Hi This is Kat!

Today is Jo and Randy’s anniversary… She called me up and she was so stressed about Cole. She says he is so disrespectful to her and mean. I could tell he was in the room or near by when she was talking to me because she was very loud as if she wanted him to hear what she says about him.... She does this about once maybe twice a month! :(

She said I have to get this little fuc#er out of this house bla bla blah… She said some times I hate him! Then she said she wishes she never would have had him.... and the thing that made me the saddest was that she doesn’t care if he dies or not and she doesn’t think she would even cry if he did!

I cannot imagine hearing or saying those things. I pretended Mark needed my help so I could get off the phone.

I know her anniversary is very not a good day… she always ends up feeling used as she has to pay the bill and neither are interested in sex or cuddling :( so she feels she did all the work making reservations and paying the bill and he does nothing… she keeps score on things like that!

I would love to say Jo was wasted when she said that… but I don’t think she was. I am sure she had a few drinks as always but not drunk by any means.... She often says these things about Cole and Randy.... I guess that is why she is leaving me everything?

She said Cole had been drinking as he was acting schizo… but she has no idea what he is doing with the cans…she said he is so stupid he probably ate them. What a sad sad life. She feels a slight responsibility for his survival (trust me I selected that word carefully) but there is no love there at all....
I often suggest that maybe he is not drinking.... he is just having an episode. but usually when that happens Jo goes ape shit nuts on him making it far worse.... even at times police have been called… then I believe that is when Cole drinks… he is self medicating and trying to escape screaming as I am sure he gets flash backs of her doing this his whole life :(:(:(

We are so opposite… people often wonder how we can be best friends.... At first I think I felt she needed me… then I started taking care of her by dropping off food or feeding her…I see the real jo. the soft sweet person inside her. She resents Cole… he tied her down where she could not drink all the time.

I don’t think she wants to hate him but deep down it comes out! He ruined her life…

With me… she can be jo not mom or wife. That part of her life she hates… it makes he sad and depressed.

I wish I could get her to stop drinking again. I helped her quit after her father’s death. She had gotten a public intoxication so they were going to lessen it if she quit drinking… or something like that.????
She remained sober for a year! For a whole year! But the idiot guy she was seeing (Rob) let her drink with him....as he would drink in front of her!!!!!! WTF.

During that time while she had a clear head that is when she slowly started to sign things over to me as sole beneficiary. I never would have agreed to it if she was drinking… but in this program she had to test every day… so there was no cheating

I just wish she did not hate her life so much.... I want to get her sober so she doesn’t miss the rest of her life…as she is now just sleeping away her days