Please, tell me in Journal

who is more responsible?
The tween who makes a bad decision, or their parents?

I’m continually blown away by the blindness of otherwise reasonable and responsible people to parental responsibility.
Gen z is estranged from their parents at all time highs- over 25%! And who out there is asking what in the world did their parents do? I’ve heard not one. Not one. It’s just “look at how sad, pitiful, ungrateful, selfish, uncaring, etc gen z is!” And, yes, sure. Let’s look at that. But let’s also ask, who is more responsible?
It’s really quite something. There is no other relationship in this universe that has more of a power disparity. Not even brutally aggressive criminals and their victims. Parents have more power and authority over their children than violent criminals have over their victims. Yet almost without exception, the accepted and expected attitude is “something is wrong with you if you aren’t grateful for and happy with your parents”. If there is something wrong with the parent -child relationship, we automatically blame the child. “How sad”, “his poor mum”, “he cut off his parents bc of that!?”
We blame the child. It’s always the child, unless something truly and undeniably traumatic justifies them.
This is the same as blaming the victim of rape. Worse, actually, because of the aforementioned unmatched power dispary. Whatever the victim of rape has to say about her rapist, we listen to with sympathy and support. But not children.
Never for the child.