My notebook in These titles mean nothing.

July 10, 2023, 8:51 p.m.
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Public

I live to a great degree in my spiral bound notebook - the cheap kind that come with 70 narrow lined pages and a bright colored cardboard front and a plain cardboard back. The current one is yellow and it’s labeled with the year - 2023, my name and both ha ha ha phone numbers. On the outside of the back cover are names and addressed and a few phone numbers. Inside the book is a form of my life. I used to be good/better at it. I would staple and cut and glue things in the book. I considered it a form/loosely speaking of art. I have a couple book shelves of them in my bedroom. They are what needs to be burned when I die.
Either that or donated to the county museum. Or perhaps more likely something in between.

It contains somewhat of a record of the recent trip. I plan to transfer/transcribe it here. Let’s see what happens.

Another thing - another part of my life is my post midnight youtube adventures. Believe it or not there are journaling specialists on youtube. The two I’ve encountered are men. They attribute a lot of self improvement to wrigtng in a notebook. Both are cutely masculine in that they specify and recommend a type of notebook, a type of pen, and a pattern for writing.

My current guy is Chip Franks. He’s into GRATITUDE. I can take or leave GRATITUDE. I admit that I have as much to be grateful for as the average person. I am amenable to listing/ rolling around in /etc. in my fortunate circumstances. Well maybe I am. What I really try not to do is to indulge in regret. Either do it or don’t do it. Then forget about it. Is that life? Maybe. Maybe not. I think I may have forgotten the source of Maybe. Maybe not. Ah I remember.

It was another guy on the internet. He was fairly available but he wasn’t anyone who appealed to be a lot. I can tell you he had named himself after his Harley Davidson. He lived on the east side of San Francisco Bay,, and early on he told me he was happy to talk to me but he wanted to stay married. I told him good. I admired him for that - that was what I always said to guys like him, or even guys not like him. I said it suited me perfectly too. I said it was a good thing. That’s when he said to quote in actual quotation marks - “Maybe. Maybe not.”
Wow, isn’t that great? I thought it was. I still do.

I just went back in youtube’s history = great thing by the way = and found the journalling clip I watched on June 28 when I obviously had a lot of time on my hands.