annoyed in just testing

Teach has been wanting to go to this paint your own cermaics thing for a while and Will is gone this weekend so I ask her if she wants to go and now she says no cause she's broke.

So I'm annoyed cause... I dunno - I've hit that point where of the maybe ... 10 close friends I used to have. Many of them have kids and even more have moved away from where I am - where we all used to be.

And when Will's around - since I don't get to see him much - I'm content to stay on the couch with him.

But now he's not around and Teach is one of my few childless friends who is still in the area and she's been wanting to go to this place for a month but we've never set plans and now I try and she's broke.

It sucks that she's broke. I am too. But I do a lot myself some money. I allotted myself $40 this month.

Yes I'm that broke. But $40 just for me, cause the rent, phone, care insurance, health insurance, gym and electricity are paid. I bought a few groceries. A threw a couple hundred towards the credit card debt. And I left myself $40 to do something with.

And now there's NO ONE to do anything with. Which just makes me depressed.

Maybe I should have a kid - just to have someone to DO something with cause I'm always alone!!!

I am always alone.

I see Will a couple times a month. I wake up and he's asleep. I go to work. I eat dinner alone. I go to bed alone. And on weekends...

I'm ALONE

Hopefully if he gets this new job it changes things.