remembering him for who he is not as he is now. /thinking about the past. in The Wonderland Years: 2014. Done.

well I mean. that's a bit of an odd way to articulate that sentence since you don't remember people as they are in the present. I mean 'remembering' isn't thinking about the present. er that's. not quite what I meant.

no I mean/t. i'm remembering him as he was and i'm not seeing him for who he is now. yeah there we go. except I am. clearly as we keep having all these problems. which are brought on by the present not the past.

no I just. I miss who he was. [sorry 'he' being evan of course]. who he used to be. cause to me who he used to be seemed better. and back then seemed better. and yeah parts of it were. the part of it that was was that. no one got involved w/ what I was doing and so therefore I actually could do w/e the fuk I wanted. I did what I wanted when I wanted. for 4 yrs. no i lived my life for me. I didn't have to be accountable to anyone most of the time. that was most of why I was content although in actuality I wasn't really no not really. [well I spent 2 yrs. heavily drinking so no I wasn't]. yeah but no one knew that. bc other than my ex and evan no one came over all that much. I always knew there was a possibility it'd end but I didn't pay much notice to it. and yeah my ex and evan didn't like that I drank that much but they didn't get others involved in it either.

and that's what I miss about it. was the lack of people.

I read this online a few mins. ago. I think it's interesting: http://www.successconsciousness.com/blog/motivation/past-better-than-present/

Last updated August 10, 2014