Hair cutting in Aftermath

So woke up early, I think that I went to bed later. At least I didn’t wake up at 7 am or something.

Anyways. Cats are right beside me showing me love purring and cuddling with me  so nice

It’s Monday now. I made a video last night but I don’t think it’s going to do well because it’s not that good and it’s not about love or really more simplistic sort of boring even maybe

The spreads are maybe not my style too maybe I should stick to more improv style readings, I don’t know we will see.

I will do another reading today and think about buying another love deck to add to my readings. Maybe from everything intuitive or something.

Don’t know what else I will do today. I don’t have alot to pack really. I think most is packed, most stuff I still sort of need so. It can easily be packed up. I think my mom’s comming back on Wed to finish it with me I guess. .

I got this beautiful Rumi deck, I will use it in a pick a card for my instagram today very accurate and deep

I want to get a pedicure and a haircut soon, probay Thursday I will. I am going to see where I can find a good one. I kind of liked Parlour I’ll look to see their locations I also want them to let me keep my hair for the hair burning ritual I will do.

I hope whoever is cutting my hair isn’t a racist and is rude about it.

Anyways, I guess I have to do litter today I wish fucking laundry but fuck these dirty ass washing and dryer machines esp when people steal.

I don’t know what will come up with my clothes, probably nothing. I will change my number after I move

Hopefully they have no idea where I am going

I hope they start harassing me for the key charges and I will harass back with where’s my fucking clothes and they will say we are not responsible for lost or stolen items and I will say it’s the least you could do considering the last year and a half all my disability accomedations were declined, my case worker ghosted me and turned on me, I was never protected when I was harassed right in front of staff. Or even asked if I was ok. Repeatly thrown to the wolves with no support from staff for the police. My repairs were not done and neglected and there was never any meaning communication from YWCA about why or how to comprise.

They stonewalled me and I am enraged fuck these stupid people. Least they could do.

They oppressed and abused me. And all they care about is a measly 80 dollars. Pathetic.

Anyways.. I don’t know what else I will do today.make alot of content I think for insta maybe some for Tik Tok but Tik Tok is annoying and not very safe. I havent got any hate comments yet but I know I will  and I don’t know if I want to stick around to see what these assholes have to say. I am so sensitive right now.

I started bawling my eyes out yesterday on the street.

Someone had a knife outside my apartment and stabbed someone at Dundas square. Really scary.i feel like I felt it.

I called crisis line . And talked to someone named Kimberly she knows me pretty much I think I call often enough. I don’t know if she Really cares about what I have to say. No one really does.  But when I said that she said nothing

Maria is meh too

I don’t feel important to anyone, so I am going to stop trying as much I guess? If that’s possible. She was manipulative a bit saying about her kids blah blah how was it supposed to know? But than a part of me is like well I should know. But at the same time just because I don’t have kids doesn’t mean I am not busy sometimes too. Whatever though. . maybe BC now that I’m moving Away or something loosing interest

She flaked on me twice already. I am thinking of blocking her eventually maybe. I just do too much of the work now. She’s less communicative and looks down on me and has no interest In my life. Idk.

She’s friends with my ex healer who said that I am abandoning the laterally violent Indigenous community here while simultaneously I sting my neighbour friend who died from an overdose blaming her and making her into a moral failure which she is not. She was poisoned by the drug. She was trying to get better. So I stopped seeing that one and I reported what she said but nothing was done whatever.

I don’t know how Maria would feel if she knew that I didn’t like her anymore and that I told her work what she said to me. Since I am a newer friend aquintance a d this woman was her ex BF’s aunt or something she’d probably not like me and cut me off or not trust me. That’s just the way things go. I am an add on. Friend a liability.

It’s hard having no real friends and other ppl having that. I wish people would be more sensitive to that or mature

The best option is just to find ppl like me, that don’t have kids husband’s etc. Or a Sid group of friends etc.

3 days till moving couldn’t go any slower
1 day till money day I think