Parents just don't understand! in My Unpredictable Life ...

You're welcome for the earworm ...

So this is what I woke up to last Friday. The hell?!! Weather service said maybe a stray wet flake mixed in with the rain they were forecasting but definitely no accumulation. We weren't west enough for any amount of snow.

So I got to sleep in that Friday morning due to a teacher's work day. First day I have been able to sleep in since Aug. 20. Granted I work nights on the weekends but I think there has only been 2 Sunday's that I have been able to sleep as long as I want/need to. Every Sat. I have to get up after 4 or 5 hours for volleyball games. Then after dinner/family time, I lay back down for another 2 or 3 hours. On Monday's I have to be up by 2 pm to get The Child from school & then homework, dinner, karate, dishes, etc. and I finally get to pass out round 9/10 pm. Only to get up at 6:30 am Tues. - Fri. since Hubby is having to be to work by 7 am & can't take her to school.

I just want to sleep.

So anyway, I threatened all kinds of mean, hard, laborous housework to whoever woke me up before my body was ready to get up on that morning. I woke up around 8:30 and my bladder finally won the battle at 8:50. I get up, take care of that, head out to the kitchen, start my coffee pot, put my jacket on, put the leash on the dog, grab a cigarette and open the door. I just stood there kinda in a daze. So I closed the door back, closed my eyes, counted to 10, and then opened the door again. "Holy shit!" was the only thing I could mutter. The Child is all, "What? What's wrong? Are you okay Momma?" So I shut the door again, turned to face her & said, "You aren't going to believe this. Come open this door and tell me what you see." So she did. And she saw the same thing I did. Snow on the ground, snow falling from the sky. Her words, "What the .... ? How is this possible? Did you know it was going to snow?" No, kid, ... no, I did not know it was going to snow.

Of course, it was Hubby's birthday. The Child & I had been planning all week that when I woke up, we'd go to Walmart to get stuff for her to make him cupcakes. We were worried if we bought the stuff too early he'd find it since he likes to get up in the middle of the night to raid the pantry/fridge. Since I am from the south, I don't have a clue how to drive in this crap. Last year, I didn't drive when it was actually snowing but would drive the 8/10 of a mile afterwards to/from the school while the roads were still covered in ice. Not fun. So here I was, in this pickle. I didn't have enough of the ingredients to make them from scratch of course. So I put my big girl panties on (after digging out my winter coat for her since her's was too small) and away we went.

Luckily since we had not had our first frost of the season or hard freeze, the roads were still warm enough that the roads were only slushy. We get to Walmart, get everything we need & head back home. Only then to realize that we had forgotten birthday cards for him. Ugh. She said she'd make them lol.

When it was all said and done, the local NWS said the city got from 2.8 to 3.5 inches of snow. In the middle of October. The hell? I hope it is not a sign of what is to come for this winter.

I swear The Child is going to kill me one of these days. On Mondays & Fridays she has karate practice. On Tuesday & Thursday's she has volleyball practice. The 1st & 3rd Tuesday of the month she has Girl Scouts. 3 to 4 times a week she stays 30 minutes after school for band practice. Saturday's are volleyball games day. The only day of rest is Wednesday & Sunday. Of course I have to work Friday, Saturday & Sunday nights so I'm trying to sleep in between volleyball games and family time. Her last volleyball game is next Saturday with playoffs being on Nov. 2. Then we are done. Yay. Not. She has decided she wants to play basketball next. The hell kid? Of course the first basketball game is Nov. 9th. So I don't even get one Saturday to sleep normal. I can sleep when I am dead, right?

But how can I say no to her?

(You can see the white blur of the ball in the green stripe on the wall lol and yes that is a smile on her face from actually hitting the ball lol)

I recently was talking with Joleen about all of The Child's activities. It was nice to talk with someone who understood my way of thinking. I mean, most everyone I know understands. But a few don't. Which is fine. She is my child, my responsibility. My mother doesn't understand because she was never a dedicated mother. She had kids because she was told that was what she was supposed to do. She didn't actually want to be a mom. And she wasn't. Maybe that is why I am so determined to be a Mom. Not the world's best Mom. But a Mom nonetheless. At least more than mine was to me.

As like most parents, I want the best for her. I want her to have all that I didn't. I want her to have the opportunity's I didn't have. There is nothing wrong with that. According to my mother, because I didn't have it & turned out just fine, then MY child doesn't need to have it either. My child will not miss out just because I want to sleep or I want to spend the money on something else. Case in point - we almost missed out on knowing what a natural at karate she is. I didn't want to waste money on something that I knew she wouldn't stick with because of her history with sore muscles. I just knew that once she got the first sore muscle, she would be done and never want to do it again. Like she did with gymnastics and soccer and ballet and cheer leading. But thanks to a coupon for 2 free weeks, a star was born and I couldn't be prouder! Definitely much poorer financially, but so worth every penny. I almost denied her a calling.

It baffles me the amount of parents who drop their kids off without a care in the world and come back later for them. At karate, there are only 4 sets of parents (myself/Hubby included) that actually walk their kids inside and stay for the practice session. Same for volleyball. How do you NOT want to sit and watch your child learn and grow? How can you want to miss out the huge smile they get on their face when they finally master something that has been giving them difficulty for weeks? How can you not want to sit there and cheer them on with words of encouragement? How can you not want to show your child how proud you are of them by being there and supporting them?

Somehow or another, I was nominated to be Assistant Volleyball Coach for my daughters team. (I don't even know how the hell that happened!) I've been working one on one with some of the girl's helping them to better their serve. Much improvement has been made. No, I am not tooting my own horn. I'm just taking the time to work with them and praise them for job well done so that they build the confidence in themselves to work harder so that they DO improve.

Anyway, Remi is the runt of the team. She's like 4 foot tall and 70 lbs. Poor thing just can't get a ball over the net to save her life. For one, she doesn't have the hand-eye coordination. Two, she has no power in her skin and bones body to put behind the serve. But she tries. In my book, that is all that matters: you try. The other night I spent 45 minutes with her one on one and she was finally getting it. She was lacking about 3 feet shy of the net, but considering that she could only serve it a distance of 3 feet, and it was foul to boot. The point is, she was feeling confident! She was no longer getting upset with herself when she didn't serve it perfect. She just picked up the next ball and tried again.

Her mother was so proud of her! She finally came over & gave Remi a high 5 and then said, "That's good, but try it this way instead." Remi tried to explain she didn't want to, that she wanted to continue doing it how she was doing it but her mother wouldn't listen. So Remi tried it her Mother's way and in less than 5 minutes we were right back to square one with Remi upset that she couldn't serve the ball perfectly, or at least serve it the way her Mother wanted her to. All my hard work, down the drain. I tried to talk to the Mom and say, "Hey, she's finally getting it. Let's let her continue this way and then once she has all the confidence that she needs, then we get her to try it your way. Especially since this is not a competition team, but something fun for the girls to do." Her reply was, "She needs to learn how to do it correctly. I don't care if this is for fun or not. Come here Remi!" Next thing I know, she made Remi put her ball down and they left. Way to support your kid there, Mom. At the game on Saturday, the Mother wouldn't even look at me. That's okay, I noticed Remi doing it the way she was doing it with me, even though she never got it over the net. And I made sure to clap for her and cheer her on anyway. Because she tried.

Parent's - your children need you to cheer them on. They need you to support them. They need you to be patient. They need you to love them regardless if they are doing it right or wrong. They need you to just be there. That errand can wait. Spending that one hour with them won't kill you. Even if you are just sitting in the bleachers or off in a corner. They will know you are there. Just please, don't let them see you looking more at your smartphone than at them. They do notice things like that also.

They need you there more than just on game days.

And no, I am not the perfect parent. What I have learned is from trial and error. I remember my childhood and wanting what all the other kids had that I didn't have (supportive parents). What I have learned is mostly from listening to my kid though. I know one day she is NOT going to want me hanging around. She's going to want me to go run errands during practices. But I do know that one day, she will be glad that I was there for every practice, every game. She will be glad that I gave up sleep for her. She will be glad that I put her first. And one day, when she has children of her own, she will have had a good example of how to be a good parent and won't flounder around the way I did.

I remind myself that one day she will be grown and gone and I would give anything to have this time back again. Yes, it is chaotic. But it is worth every second of it to have the memories that will one day comfort me when I am lonely.

As parents, we owe it to our kids to be there for them. The difference can be as great as future Doctors, scientists, astronauts. Or they can end up being like the idiots who now run our government. You, as their parent, hold the future of the world in your hands. How they turn out as adults is up to you. When my child is President one day, no one will ever demand for her impeachment.