Scribble, Scribble - 08.10.13 in Your Face

Not such a great day today. I lost sight and allowed myself to feel sad and depressed at having nowhere to be and no purpose other than to go to work and earn the money.

I didn't smoke any cigarettes, which is one good thing. I am very tempted, though. Ate a huge dinner and now I just want to sleep.

Pay day tomorrow, and testing out the budget starts. I have bills to pay so I won't get very far, but if I can make my personal budget work, in a few weeks I should be in a better position.

Tonight mother tried to justify my brother's behaviour as a result of him being depressed. I agree that his depression is a problem, but I had to say to her that I am not the audience for that shit - I am considering the ways I could kill myself on a daily basis, yet I still continue to get up, go to work, clean up after myself, prepare meals, pay bills. Depressed or not, I have no sympathy for a man-child who still needs mummy to buy his toilet paper and body soap because he's too useless to do it for himself.

What's a good thing about today? I will meet my 1.5L water intake goal - it has been ages since I have been able to do that.

Lights out at 7:30pm, probably won't sleep until 9pm ...