sept. 3, 2012 in The Wonderland Years: 2012: 1/2 done

'So Wed. night he [James] comes down to the bar. again. yay.

We do a duet. I've missed our duets. it goes well. We do 'don't stop believin'.......no one's done that in awhile. From what I recall I have a good night except that Kevin's there, the guy who I had to let down last wk. He's, clearly, still hurt. well wouldn't you be? we don't talk. it's just too soon.

I sing a Nickelback song for the first time ever - 'Breathe - and that goes well. I like them. song's a bit fast. and........uh.......On My Own [Les Mis] cause the karaoke lady - Amanda - doesn't have any of my songs [22 - Lily Allen, Never Forget You - Noisettes and......  Uncle John's Band, the Dead]. Except 1, Helen Reddy's 'Ain't No Way To Treat A Lady'. it's pretty, i like it. near the end i really get into it. The bar's fairly dead by that time - it's around midnight - so only a few people clap. But I also think not a lot of people my age listen to that song, so. All the songs go well. I thought I'd do differently w/ On My Own, since I've been singing it a lot. er, rather, i thought i'd perform it differently. It's v. sober, somber.

I've discovered this about Helen Reddy: her music's emotional.

My man meets my bar friends Alex [he's Gwen's ex] and Holly who apparently know each other. they're cool. and nice. Holly's cute......she always has something nice to say......she's sweet. i love her. ya know, just one of those people who purely based on that you love. she's just a doll.

As usual, the gay people are there. and Brittany and her mom. We exchange 'hellos'. Her mom's got wedges on [shoes........i'm mentioning this bc the other day I was watching a cable show online and one of the dudes on it talked about wedges. took me a minute to remember what they were] which I compliment her on.

Oh so while at the bar I talk to a homeless guy, which I didn't realise he was untill he brings it up. I'm pretty shocked to discover this...........I don't judge. He's just a nice guy, genuine. just one of those people.

I'm feeling a bit off [more on this later. also, pool] that night so I don't socialise much. which is fine.

So after, we - James & I - go to my place where I change, get my stuff together to go up to his place. I remember I spend um. Thurs. in his room. cause, I'm feeling off. Not cause I don't like them [Max, Jasmine, my man. aka 'the arvada people'], as I so obviously do. And then..........on.........Fri.  we go to Mills.

oh so on the way up to his place this guy we saw at the bar shouts out his rolled-down window to us "drive safe!". this confuses James who has no idea how the guy 'knows' us. I fill him in.

E

So at Mills we go to the food court. And sit right by the carousel. i love them. and, interestingly, i don't like horses. i used to. they don't like, scare me or anything. I have trouble deciding what I want to eat. i've had pasta lately so i don't want that. it's between pizza and burgers. i decide on a burger w/ mayo, tomatos and......onions. and cheese. he gets beef & broccoli from Panda. [Express. which he apparently always does]. w/ chicken. i have some it's good.

We go into the game store & bath & bodyworks. then..........get to the point where we both don't want to do much so we go back to his place where I, again, go into his room. In a few hrs. he comes in i tell him i'm having a moment but don't go into much detail. we go out into the living room and watch Max play a video game. and help him try to locate a um thingy. via the map. a...........water thing. er no wait. another bridge? or maybe it's a cave?...........clearly i don't remember too well.

At some point during the weekend we watch Lord Of The Rings & play Risk. which i'd played the first time Thurs. Max wins Risk. he has 32 guys on the board and i have only 4. James is out and he's like 'do you just want to let Max win?.........he's going to anyway at this rate'. sure ok.

yeah i still don't like LOTR. didn't the first time i saw it. i remember it being pretty. though when i saw it at their place i was 1: high and B: playing Risk, as just stated, so. my attention was divided.

We were stoned a lot this weekend as I recall.

Um so Sat. James has work. and i'm stuck inside all day. I talk to Mary Kitty about my issues a bit. cats are great listeners. and excellent secret keepers. as am i...........except when it comes to my own. and take the photos of her i've posted on here. And I sleep as I've forgotten to bring a book w/ me.

there's prolly more that i've forgotten......

again, E.

**So then when he gets home from work we go back to my place for, like, an hr. er that's how long he stays. um. On the way there we talk about music. When we get there he Youtubes music videos............Linkin Park, Bloodhound Gane............

I don't remember when I fall asleep. or even if I do.

So then on Sunday.........my sister & I do stuff. I'm sittin around watchin 'Funny Lady' [the sequal to 'Funny Girl'. which i don't like as much] not doin much of anything. She's at my place between 2 and 3.</p<>