Sunday - 06.10.13 in Your Face

I vomited all day yesterday. I couldn't even drink water or disolvable asprin without it being ejected. It made me think more about the possibility of having had a drink spiked, but I guess the jury it out on that. All I know is, I have never gotten so suddenly ill and never been so physically sick before, even when I had that bout of gastro in Santa Fe I wasn't so ill. Not even when I had alcohol poisoning in 2007.

So obviously my Saturday was a write off. I had staggered into the shopping centre in the morning to buy some groceries as I only had snackfoods in my sister's house. Tried to drink a frozen Coke and threw it out half finished because it was burning my throat.

Lay around on the lounge all day, getting up periodically to vomit. By 7pm I was extremely hungry, so I drove to a nearby Chinese take away to order some steamed rice and a wonton soup without the wontons. It send the waitress into a conniption fit because she couldn't understand that I basically wanted a bowl of broth, even after I explained that I was unwell.

A few spoonfuls of rice and most of the broth went into my belly and I was thankful when it remained in there.

I'm still at my sister's house for one more night and it has been nice, if lonely. I feel lonely at mother's house so it's not much different.

I had a frustrating few days at work with the new me. I was hammered with work that she is not competent enough to do, plus settling in a new solicitor, and every time I turned around she was dicking around on her phone or browsing concert tickets online. I asked her to do 2 things and both times directed her to the written instructions in our department manual and both times she thought she knew better, and both times she did the completely wrong thing. I'm so glad I'm being forced to spend hours updating that manual and creating precedents that idiots don't even bother to use. So fucking frustrating. I don't expect her to know everything, and I know I asked her to do something that she had only done once before, THAT'S WHY I DIRECTED HER TO THE WRITTEN INSTRUCTIONS. It's like the co-worker who finished up on Friday - she would always be asking whether a bank is a mortgagor or mortgagee, and I would tell her, and without fail she would call a solicitor to ask because she didn't believe my answer. Um, hello fucktards? I will be finishing my second law degree in a matter of months, I've been working in law for 8 years and I prepare mortgage documents at least once a week. Silly me, how could I possibly know the answer to an easy question that you ask me every month, which I answer and provide you with an easy way to remember, and which you fail to retain because you're dumber than dog shit.

Like, fuck, guys. Another woman there works 2 days a week and is considering doing a 1 year course. Problem is: she doesn't want to pay for it, doesn't want to borrow the money through work because the repayments would eat up anything she earns in 2 days and doesn't even want to do the course unless she comes out and immediately earns a shitload of money. For starters, it's a conveyancing course and conveyancers NEVER earn a shitload of money because there is very little profit in conveyancing. And if you're already coming up with excuses not to do the course, then give it up already. I don't want to study full time and work full time, but I want my degree enough that I will deal with it. This bitch works 2 days a week (and has 2 kids, to be fair) and is whining about doing a course that runs ONE YEAR, with only 2 subjects per semester. I want to shake her and tell her that I've been doing 4 subjects every semester plus 2 subjects over Christmas for 3 years now (did the same for 2 years for the first degree also, although the work over the Christmas break wasn't available back then), while fronting up to work 3 days a week as the only secretary to 3 solicitors (she works for 1 who is half retired) in the busiest and most profitable department in the firm.

She has genuine gripes about it, she just has the wrong audience. That's the problem. I mention that I won't be in the office util noon because I have an exam in the morning and immediately the girls start making comments about how nice it would be to have a half day. I tell them about how I have to use my annual leave to sit exams, not for holidays like they do, and that exams are much worse than being at work, but their eyes glaze over while they daydream about sleep ins and coffee dates.

Even if I wasn't moving overseas, there's just no way I could have stayed with this firm. Can you imagine the gripes they would have when I was admitted and started giving them work? They already think I get special treatment because I'm my boss' "pet", and not because I work my ass off and am smarter than they are.

I really hope my next job is with people with goals. Here I am a big fish in a small pond. It's easy for me to do well because everyone else does so poorly. But I am wasted here. I want to work somewhere where I am not the best, where I have to work harder and have to compete. I will never get bigger and better by staying on top of a pile of morons. I want that gate to be opened so I can run through it.

Rant over ... for now.

Fortune Cookie: Change is happening in your life, so go with the flow!