A Victory! in A New Beginning

I am a hero. I am not gloating over it, but I am proud of myself because I did something that represents a milestone to me. I stood up, not just for me but for all my covenmates, to our ever-difficult High Priestess Darleen. Why this is a milestone is that throughout my life I have a history of not standing up for myself TO WOMEN. I've always stood up for myself to men, so I really don't know why I've let women walk all over me at times. But anyhow.....that's changed!

We have rules about how things are to be done, within our Assembly of the Sacred Wheel. Darleen has always seemed to think that it's ok for her to make her own rules. She's a very headstrong woman, and of course she always thinks she's in the right. Well, when any of us do things, hopefully we think we are in the right! But a difference among people is (and let's face it!), some people usually ARE right, and others are often not. Some people's actions are motivated more by their hearts or their lower regions....and that IS important sometimes, to be sure! And others' actions are motivated mostly by their heads. I'm Aquarius....almost entirely a thinker....and Dar's Leo....a fiery person ruled more by the heart and lower portions. If there's a disaster and you need to be saved by someone who's bold enough to jump in there and do it, Dar is definitely the person you need! But if you need to make plans to prevent disaster from happening, you're better off with me. Dar and I are polar opposites. We know that we are, and I think we both know that the best results come from us being able to work together, but I think both of us have a "There Can Be Only One" mentality, too. I don't want to be the High Priestess, but I do want the rules to be followed. I think I'm slowly stepping into the role of Enforcer, and I see that as being symbolized by a Warhorse.

Anyhoo....getting to my actual story, here! One rule has to do with new people, and how they might be brought into the Assembly. We are not like a Church and we are not open to the public. We are particular about who takes part in our events and are not open to, for example, "the merely curious." Wiccan ritual is not a spectator sport, and since a lot of our work is done in small groups and is intensely personal, we have a lot of rituals that are closed to outsiders. However, throughout the year there are various OPEN (to the public) rituals and classes, too. If a new person expresses interest, we are supposed to direct them toward those.

So it came as a great surprise to the covenmates when Dar sent out an email simply informing us that some young woman she'd recently met had been invited (by her) to come to our upcoming Lughnassadh AND RE-DEDICATION rituals. Lughnassadh is one thing; it is the first harvest sabbats. But our Re-Dedication is the one time each year when members (if they wish) make vows to stay with the coven for another year-and-a-day. These vows are spoken aloud before the group. Members immediately began replying to Dar's email, saying that they consider our Re-Dedication to be sacred and just for US, and they most certainly did not want to have a complete stranger standing there taking it all in.

Dar doesn't ever admit she is wrong, so she just emailed us all again, stating tersely that she had "conferred with The Bonded" and this was the final decision and the way it was going to be.

Now, "The Bonded" is another little chapter in this story. People can "bond" to a coven. This is an even-beyond-this-lifetime commitment to work toward the longevity of a coven and its connection to The Sacred Wheel. The Bonded have a purpose, but it is not supposed to have much to do with the day-to-day running of the coven. That's what the coven officers are for. A High Priestess or Priest has to become bonded to the coven; for anyone else it's optional. In our coven, Dar and Annie were bonded. Then, a year ago and quite secretively, they decided to bond Denise to the coven as well. No one knew anything about it until we all read it on the Assembly news board! Imagine that, willya? And from that point on, Dar decided that NOW it was The Bonded who were to be the coven leadership! NOT "the officers"....which completely (and I think purposely) left me, the Scribe, out. I did not like it, but I also have been verrrrrrrry busy with so many different things, I just didn't feel like taking it on.

But now there was this aforementioned travesty! My covenmate Keyla called me, all upset and enraged about it. I'd already read the emails of protest from the others. I told Keyla that I would think about what to do. Whatever was to be done had to be thorough. The next morning I sent Dar a rather lengthy email, quoting the sections of The Assembly Charter that detail how new people are to be brought in, and what the role of bonded members is supposed to be. I also sent a copy to Annie, and.....the clincher!.....a blind copy to Michael, our Elder. I knew Michael would be interested in knowing about all this. What was particularly amusing was that Dar's bossy email to all of us, AND the protest emails from the coveners, were all attached!

I have not been told all the details of what transpired next, but I can tell what happened by the results that WERE revealed. Darleen emailed the coveners and said that she had rescinded her invitation to the newbie and let her know about the open ritual one of the other nearby covens instead. (This is what I had told her she was supposed to do! HA!) THEN she said that Michael is going to be teaching a class on The ASW Charter, including what the roles of the High Priest/ess and "bonded" are supposed to be, on August 27th....for not just our coven but ALL the covens in our circle. HA! A few minutes after I read these emails, Keyla called me and joyously said, "Victory!" Yes. She said it would never have happened if I had not sent that email. YES. Sometimes it is necessary to step out of one's comfort zone and speak up. I don't like making people mad at me, but if Dar is mad at me, that is just too damn bad. I am not her High Priestess; she is mine. I should not have to call her to task and go to Michael, in order to get her to do things right. She is 70 years old and ought to be a lot more mature than she is, so there.

Anyhow, I started that a week ago! This week we've had Carrie and Max here, and we've had a great time! I will write about that in my next entry. I hope it's been a great week for you all, my dear friends! hugs and blessings, Nicky