Church!? in Journal

  • Feb. 18, 2023, 3:16 p.m.
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  • Public

Scream the atheists and Christians alike, when they discover I’m an atheist going to service. It’s not that weird, though. I mean, it’s unusual. But, logical. I needed to take seriously the warning system deep in my brain, programmed from billions of years of evolution to survive. If I don’t want to feel distraught, then I should act to prevent it. Lol. Simple yet it seems, very difficult. No one wants to be the first person in their vicinity to start talking about how most of us will probably die in a half decade. So it might be prudent to start preparing to try not to die.
We don’t have a family, anymore. My family, if ever I had one, thoroughly proved their complete disdain for me when gma died a month and a half ago and no one bothered letting me know. I even spoke to a cousin who never mentioned it. So, they’re not to be relied on for help, nor afforded any. DHs family is a possibility.. except that DH himself is so avoidant of discomfort that he’d rather avoid them.
So Church it is.

Started PT and I feel so different already. Been doing the exercises faithfully and I’m so glad that they are working so quickly. It’s pretty simple stuff, but nothing that I could have figured out myself, alone. I wonder why all women aren’t taught a few of these exercises either during prenatals or postnatal. There are A LOT of women walking around with dysfunctional pelvic floors. Now that I know what to look for, it’s pretty obvious. Even after riding horses for years and having intimate knowledge of my pelvic tilt and tension, I didn’t know that there were ways to strengthen those muscles. It’s part of why this current way of life is unsustainable. It is not fundamentally interested in ensuring continuation.

I feel more excited and happy. Looking forward to the challenge of figuring out how to survive a SHTF scenerio is less anxiety inducing for me than for others, I think, because I’m not particularly attached to this society. It also strikes me as an opportunity. Probably a once in several century opportunity, in all reality. That opportunity is similar to the one the founding fathers had. The attitudes, beliefs, principles, etc, that I bring forward, if they survive the crucible of selection, will be propagated for eternity. And it is genuinelyexciting, interesting, and satisfying, to test and learn and build concepts that are grounded, concrete, empirical, and moral.


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