mortality rate in Second 1st

My remaining Aunt on my mom’s side passed last night. I hate the thoughts going through my head. I’d never been close to her and her one child was much older than the rest of my cousins. He has already passed, and so had her husband. I am thankful that mom was able to go see her in August. She had cancer and when mom saw her in August there was no hope. She lived far enough from family that she was excluded from most drama but as a result I’m not sure any of us knew her. I wonder if I will get to learn more now that she’s gone like I did with my Aunt Victoria. I suspect that they had a way of life the family didn’t approve of so they moved further North.... almost the Upper Peninsula.

I’m waiting on a call from mom today asking me to ride with her to MI. I can’t this time :(. Though I want to it would do her more harm than good. I’d do like I did last time and beg to be left at Destiny’s with her and Jake. I wouldn’t want to spend any time with family. It’s sad that I’m not sad.....

I didn’t go see her in August. My cousins had told me she was wasting away and living in filth. Mom stated as much, she couldn’t stay the night because of bugs. They had gone over where she will be buried, funeral plans and what to do with the house. I know mom will go up to help sort those things out.

My mother was 1 of 5 kids and now only she and my Uncle survive. I expect it won’t be too long (5 years-ish 10 if we are all lucky) before I have to go up for my Uncles funeral.... then another 5-10 for my mom.... though honestly, I think paranoia will get her first.

Is it sad that I would rather spend time with friends than go to my Aunt’s funeral.... well yeah… but who chooses to be around sad people when they can’t make a difference.

That being said Destiny is going to school now for phlebotomy. I’m so proud and excited for her but the girls aren’t helping at all! I’d love to go up and knock some scenes into them. Not to mention spending time with Jake which would be good for both our mental health..... however, it would either start the fight of not haveing supervision .... OR Rocky would assume I’d be with my mom the whole time… so a fight before or when I get back.... and I”m not ready....