Oy Boy in Current Events

I gave myself a one day breather from the academic pressure. I kept it domestic and optimized the kitchen and made some meal prep staples. My mood was pretty decent until just a few moments ago.

I read a DM from a buddy at work, he asked about our hours and he was told that there is no end in sight for these reduced hours. I shifted from academic mode to struggle mode instantaneously.

Then I saw that sad sight in the living room when I went to get a glass of water. It’s midnight, I’m never up this late. My roommate was sitting in the dark eating a bag of chips because she has zero self-control by default and is powerless to her snack attacks. She was barely chewing. She wasn’t even breathing. She was was inhaling the chips. She left the cupboard open because she is going to open every single bag and box of whatever she doesn’t have to heat up or cook. Then ice cream. She was doing so well because she quit weed but she’s back at it. Miss I can’t sleep.

It gave me flashbacks to when I would see her passed out drunk on the couch in an upright position with drool on her face, also sitting in the dark. She drank because she can’t control her emotions. She gets high because she can’t control her thoughts. She boxes 5 nights a week because she can’t control her life.

I should celebrate that she has been showing a lot of growth. I want to support that when it makes it sense. She doesn’t drink, she reduced her weed to just weekends, again. I would like to see her go out and make some friends. That’s mission impossible for our age group.

I was looking forward to this 6 day weekend. My roommate told me earlier that she is off until Tuesday as well. That’s a lot of time with her around. It is what it is. So I have to wait until next week to do a coffee enema, nbd.

I was aiming to spend all day studying but now I feel like I have to job hunt. The thought of my roommate home when I’m trying to study gets me pre-annoyed. It’s not like I can ask her to hide in her room lol

Blah, I wish I didn’t open that dm or grab that glass of water.

Last updated February 16, 2023