Alone time from myself part 2 in 40 yr old guy with add trying to make it

Sorry for the break. But sometimes my brain gets so wound up and I want to type so many different things. Then i get side tracked. And then I end up frustrated. Soo. I have thought about starting from the beginning. From the first thing I remember in life. But it would turn into a huge blender full of mush. It would go from 5 yrs old. To 20. Then back to 10. Because I would think of something funny and get side tracked. Or start getting emotional and start ranting about something. So here I am. The BIG MESS… it will be here however my brain allows it to. And thats the best I got.. I know this is supposed to be part two. But the emotional state I was in then I am no longer experiencing.. THANK YOU LORD FOR GIVING US SOME AMAZING PLANTS. If it wasn’t for that someone would normally be unhappy. Whether it’s me or any other person trying to communicate with me. Lol Without my beautiful flowering botanicals my normal complete dislike for all humans is very obvious. Because unfortunately common sense isn’t as common as it used to be.. I believe I think on a super logical level. Where everything has to make sense. And if it doesn’t I will figure out why it doesn’t. That’s how I personally discovered my wife’s condition. I kept researching every symptom individually and compared the similarities. Then found the one that had the most of the total symptoms. And demanded her doctor do any tests to prove or disprove it. And here we are. They treated her for every possible thing they could except what I figured out. She even has a pace maker at 40 because the doctors wouldn’t originally listen to me. I am a very curious person. I love to learn. But learning about something to try and save the person you love is a whole different type of obsession. I am happy I didn’t give up. But there is still a long road. That is gonna require many hours and work from both of us. But I truly believe I found who I was ment to have. And I was put in her life. Because the lord knew the person I am. And needed me for that reason. Wether it’s rite wrong or indifferent. I accepted what he asked me to do. And I won’t stop till I’m out of options. Or ideas. Love hurts. It doesn’t hurt to love. But it hurts to lose it.. but what hurts more is to have to beg for it.. so I forgot to post this originally so it has a few days all piled together. But I have some super exciting news. We found a simple answer to help control my wife’s Cushings syndrome…After doing more research. I discovered THC blocks the Receptors of cortisol. Or reduces the body’s response to it. So the symptoms should start getting milder. And once again it didn’t hit the publish button. So this is now another day later. Marijuana is medical where we live so I got her a card and now we are on the journey to find the correct dose. But she has already had some improvement with her Blood pressure just in a few days. I’m very optimistic things will quickly improve. I’m gonna end this now before I fall asleep and don’t do it again.. lol. Much love to everyone