Sun-Return Day in Current Events

I woke up feeling a little excited about having the day to myself, finally. I don’t have to be mindful of anyone or anything if I don’t want to. I will get a lot of this free time alone soon enough with my reduced hours and all.

I am trying to switch up my morning routine. Instead of scrolling through my phone until my eyes bleed, I am trying to read. I don’t have the focus. My family doctor could probably diagnose me with ADHD at this point. I’m sure of it. Then he could gaslight me into believing that it is because I am pharmaceutical deficient. Then I could build an identity around being special as a neurodivergent. Oh the attention <3.

I am going to find myself a naturopath and get their guidance on how to detox metals from my brain. I also want to do a parasite cleanse or protocol. One does not simply make it to age 37 without coming in contact with parasites. I also need to train my brain to focus and be mindful. I don’t think that this skill is intrinsic, I have to develop it. We are a society that is used to being radically distracted.

Another thing that I need to do is ground myself. I need to hug a tree or something, literally. My inner guidance wants me to sit in nature. Wants me to think of nature. To learn of nature. To be my nature. This cult we call society is all fiction. We are spiritualizing our own prison. The nature of human desire is expansion and we are trying to expand into things that are not real. I am participating but I am trying to not belong to it. I only want to serve god and the truth. To serve god I need only serve others. There was a time when asylums were everywhere. They were plenty, they were massive and they were filled to the brim. If you weren’t accepting this society you were out of touch and considered mentally ill. It is about to happen again with transhumanism. I wish I was turning 90 today. I don’t want to witness this.

37 times around the sun is what I used to say every year on my birthday but I’m a flat-earther now. I don’t even want to call it a birthday because I only had one birth day. It is my sun-return day. I’ll be that guy.

I did my class remotely yesterday because I didn’t want to face the shame of having not studied over the holiday. It would have been perfectly fine had I gone in. I have to stop doubting myself. I’m smarter than I think.

Toni, my roommate, and I had a normal interaction last night. I suppose there is no tension after all?

I am really feeling today. I have a lot that I want to do around the apartment. I shouldn’t be making any purchases but I am going to treat myself to some plants. I might hit up the casino to ruin my day… nah. Just plants. I bought felt tape for reducing hat sizes from Amazon that arrives today. I am hellbent on finding a fedora or cowboy hat. I have been seeing people wearing them ever since I returned the last one that didn’t fit. Whatever.

Boring entry for a beautifully boring day. On with it then.