Eve of a New Year in Current Events

It’s the eve of a new year, this is my favourite time of year. I like being around that New Year New Me energy. I like being around those who start making those hard choices. I love seeing people create the changes they need. Kudos to those who are willing to evolve. To hell with everyone else. I need to create some strong boundaries against that energy, those people are parasitic.

Of course, the way we see the world is the way we see ourselves. The things we don’t like about others are the things we don’t like about ourselves. That is another truth I should be more conscious of. I don’t like being around people who commit to blame, excuses and denial instead of taking ownership, accountability and responsibility because I don’t like that about myself. That is the man I no longer want to be.

I feel resentment again today. The reason is the same old same old. I’m aware that resentment is not a function of anger but a function of envy but that awareness does not make it easier. Blaming all of the retrogrades that are happening in Capricorn would be easier than looking deeper within myself. It’s easier to be a victim. I’d be playing myself if I play the blame game.

I relapsed a bit with my #NoFap journey, the quit porn movement. I didn’t watch porn, per se. I peeked at it. lol. I went for almost a whole month, I’m not letting this discourage me. I’ll just remember this guilt that I am feeling the next time I want to cave to a thirst trap.

There is a lot that I am avoiding, to be honest. I take it out on the apartment. I clean it, I cook it, I optimize it, I bop it. I think this is what I will work on for 2023. Self-discipline. Those things need to happen but I need balance. I let it take me away from my goals. I need to become goal-oriented again. I got knocked off course a few years ago. I just haven’t been the same because my journey became an inward one. Perhaps I just don’t know how to connect to the world the same way again.

Anyway, I am fasting today. I am going to do some running around. Then I’m going to start tackling my to-do list. Well, I have two lists going. One is goal-oriented, tasks that advance my goals. The other is chores.