Drab in Current Events

I got to enjoy an anxiety attack throughout my entire class yesterday evening. It did not have anything to do with the class. I had an intense day at work.

I started some drama at work again. There is a man on my team who is just a rotten character but he crossed some lines and I went to HR about it. Yesterday I participated in the investigation so the reality of the situation sunk in. He’s been suspended from work until the investigation is over, so it appears. The idea of him returning to work makes me feel a little unsettled but it is what it is.

Bev told me about a full-time employment opportunity that I could apply for. I might even though I do not want it. I am crazy enough to like the job that I currently have. A job she handed to me on a silver platter also. I just don’t have full-time hours which I didn’t know I wanted until my shifts dropped down to almost nothing. I just want the shift security.

I have one person on my team who is training to be in management. My boss is already training somebody to take over his duties. That rotten character I spoke of is potentially being terminated but I don’t know. The store is also going to add hours to my team so another full-time position is en route soon.

Altogether I have been feeling like shit lately. I’ve also been eating like shit so there is an obvious correlation. I need more structure here.

I feel a little disjointed today. I don’t know what to do with myself. I want to lose myself in my usual routine which doesn’t get me much. I have a lot that I should be doing which I should just tackle already. I have to get my car fixed. I also have to get my computer fixed. Whatever. I’ll just go soak in the tub. Maybe it will be relaxing enough to get me motivated to do something. Anything. I’ve been feeling a lot of stress so I should probably do what I can do to detox from it. Adrenaline and cortisol, it’s like having acid poured into your body all day long. My body is going to have to get rid of the waste eventually. My stomach needs a big reset, honestly. I haven’t made up my mind if I am going to fast today or not. Whatever. Just another drab entry.