Alrighty. in Since OD is shutting down....

So we took the kids to the event we had here in town. It wasn’t too bad but a lot of waiting in lines and my back was absolutely killing me towards the end. I’m just glad the kids had fun because that’s what makes me happy. I like seeing them run around and enjoying things.

I have thought a lot about my job situation and realize that I’d be better off just doing an online app for delivering food or something of that nature. I have friends that do it and make decent money and get to have complete freedom with their time where when they’re done they just end it and don’t have to do extra stuff. Just pick up food and deliver it. I think that would be better than having to do a bunch of extra driving before and after each shift and then worry I wouldn’t get off in time.

I’d like to give that a whirl because next year, my daughter will be in school and there’s an after school program so I’d be able to get a regular job and maybe have to worry about a sitter here and there which I’m sure my brother and my Mom would help out some. I still carry around a lot of guilt because of my daughter being in a daycare 6 days a week for the first 3 years of her life and how much stuff we both missed out on because all I did was work. I like being able to make up for lost time and feel like I’m a parent now. I used to parent on autopilot and I never want to do that again.

My daughter is the most important person in my life and I just want to give her the best version of me that I can. I appreciate all the comments I received on my last entry. I probably will go to the interview but I have a pretty limited capsule of time and I’m not sure how well that would go over. I honestly only want to be away from my daughter the bare minimum. Time is a thief and I have already spent so much time away so I want to just work part time and be able to have time and energy for her and be able to put my mental health on the priority list as well as my physical health.