B-day in Second 1st

It’s my birthday. For at least 5 years early to mid teens I remember waking up at 2:01 to be the first official person to wish me a Happy Birthday. Why not midnight? because I’d not been born yet, duh. LOL.

Coming from a poor family Birthdays weren’t a big deal. On our Birthday we got to choose our parent and go watch a movie and pick a place to eat out at. I recall that the rules had changed after I’d wanted to see movies I was too young for. They then changed to walking around the mall with $20 to spend.... which would buy you some trinket at very few stores.... it’s the mall after all.

I recall one birthday in which my female classmates threw me a party. I remember wondering why the one girl wanted me to come over, we weren’t really friends. I wasn’t really friends with any of them. I was a super shy child. I got made fun of a lot because of the cloths I wore and being so shy. Things didn’t get better with that till we moved south when I was 14. Anyways, it was an awkward party. Id been given some cute cloths and some bubble bath. It was super awkward though. None of the girls really knew what I liked they had just wanted to do something nice for me. In the end though I just felt like they were telling me I had no friends, that I needed to bathe and that what I had to wear wasn’t good enough. I will remember it always and look back on it differently depending on my mood really. It was a bunch of girls who honestly felt bad that I was so shy and they wanted to do this big thing. I was floundering in self doubt and couldn’t really see that. I thought the whole thing was just a big opportunity to make fun of me. A new way to find new reasons to dislike me. We were just kids..... I think it was my 11th or 12th birthday.

Now, my birthday means nothing really.... the world doesn’t stop for anyone’s birthday. I buy myself things because in general people don’t know what I want.... even Rocky.... and Destiny.... sometimes even me.... most times even me lol.... I’ve extinguished my “gifts to myself” feelings.... I’d bought 2 CD’s and a video game.... decent take I think.... That and the expensive dinner (lunch) that Rocky paid for (out of his account, not the house account lol).

I would ask you to guess my age but real life and internet are way different.

We have no plans today as far as going out. I’ll work on MTurk and Beedrill’s pokeball.... and when goal is reached I’ll trade out the pokeball for Stardew Valley. It’s going to be a quiet day and a good Birthday.